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From smoke-free home, this is a used second edition printing which includes the plastic insert and etched poker chip-style player markers.
Damage to upper right corner of box, but components unaffected and all in very good condition except for a tear on back of board.
Components are complete, although 3 yellow transparent parking lot tokens were missing and have been replaced with similar transparent tiddlywinks. Please see
pictures for more info.
submitted by gravelbrain to BoardGameExchange [link] [comments]
Guess-the-Card RPG System
Hey there, everyone! I am as new as it gets in terms of RPG Design. As of yesterday, I am now in the process of designing a system. I've come here to ask if there are any gaping holes before I continue with what I've come up with thus far. I will notate anything that counts as rules with a (-) before it. My system is as follows:
-The game uses a standard deck of playing cards (including the jokers) instead of dice. Also included are multiple groups of different colored poker chips. Players will have skills/attributes like most other RPGs (although I'm not yet sure how in-depth I want the stats to be in this system). For now, let's say that stats/skills can go up to a maximum of 3 each
-Here is a basic summary of the core mechanic. When a player is about to perform an action where luck is involved, they will first make a guess about the top card of the deck. After making their guess, they draw the top card and compare the result to their guess.
That is the quickest, easiest way to explain the system without going into any of the little nuances. I will start explaining those nuances now:
-Players are allowed to make guesses about the top card in a variety of different ways. However, some ways are more difficult to guess than others. Therefore, players will choose what's called a Difficulty Level (or DL). DL's help determine one thing only: How many poker chips the player will win. Before getting into how DL's and the poker chips are linked, I will show you the different DL's available to be chosen by the players.
7: Card is of a Specific, Declared Value & Suit (1/52)
6: Card is of a Specific, Declared Value (4/52)
5: Card has a Face (Jack, Queen, King) (12/52)
4: Card is of a Specific, Declared Suit (♥ ♦ ♣ ♠) (13/52)
3: Card has an Odd Value (3, 5, 7, 9) (16/52)
2: Card has an Even Value (2, 4, 6, 8, 10) (20/52)
1(¬): Card is (Not) of a Specific, Declared Color (Red, Black) (26/52)
2¬: Card Does Not Have an Even Value (32/52)
3¬: Card Does Not Have an Odd Value (36/52)
4¬: Card is Not of a Specific, Declared Suit (39/52)
5¬: Card Does Not Have a Face (40/52)
6¬: Card is Not of a Specific, Declared Value (48/52)
7¬: Card is Not of a Specific, Declared Value & Suit (51/52)
Here is a back-and-forth example of how a test would be taken
-Players tell the GM what their character is doing, the GM tells the player whether or not their action requires luck. The player sets their own DL based on how brave they feel. Poker chips get put at the center of the table equal to the DL. If the player draws the top card and the card matches up with the player's guess, the player takes all of the poker chips and keeps them for later use.
-For the "Negative" or "Not" DL's, players must pay poker chips equal to the desired DL¬. So essentially, players are earning poker chips in order to make their future tests easier by spending said poker chips.
-NOTE 1: DL 1 and DL 1¬ have the same chances, but for continuity's sake, players can opt to pay the 1 poker chip if they really want to. I plan to make there be reasons for why having fewer poker chips could be beneficial.
-NOTE 2: I am aware that having the Jokers in the deck make all of the chances out of 54, but this brings me to my next point.
-Before beginning play, the GM determines which Joker is a Good Joker and which Joker is a Bad Joker. Players are not allowed to guess Jokers when making a guess. Instead, if a Joker is drawn, players draw two additional cards and take either the more favorable result or less favorable result depending on which Joker was drawn (similar to D&D 5's Advantage system). Which brings me on to my next point, what makes a card more favorable than another?
-Obviously, the goal is for the player to make a correct guess about the forthcoming card. However, if the card that is drawn does not match up with the player's guess, the character does not simply fail their action. Players are still very capable of gaining some of the chips that were set aside for the DL#. Chips are taken away from the pot based on the player's "Failure Severity" or FS.
FS is pretty straightforward sometimes. For DL6, if the player guessed an 8 and the drawn card is a 5, simply take away chips from the pot equal to the difference between 8 and 5 (which is 3). The player still takes 3 poker chips from the original 6 and the character's action has still succeeded. In the narrative, the GM may state that a mishap occurred and that the character did not fully succeed (similar to the fail-forward concepts in Apocalypse World).
There is a lot more for me to talk about. For instance, FS is determined in other ways for the other DL's. I haven't described how Stats/Skills can be factored in. Also, I haven't even started talking about how players can spend their earned poker chips to draw additional cards during the same test.
However, for right now, I'd like to stop and ask those that are reading this what they think. Are there any gaping holes in my system's design thus far? Am I missing anything? Any questions or comments?
submitted by Fabaculus to RPGdesign [link] [comments]
How to hand out tokens/points?
I'm trying to use Roll20 to run a Hillfolk campaign, and there is the game mechanic to hand out tokens of different colours (e.g. Poker chips) to players, that they can keep to use for various benefits (not unlike FATE points). Is there a mechanism in roll20 for this?
Otherwise it's perfect for Hillfolk, the deck of cards works really well.
submitted by marasmuse to Roll20 [link] [comments]
Fun (but complicated) boss fight I ran for the finale of my two year (level 16) campaign
First, consider this a template you can adjust to your needs. I knew the type of players in the group and what they were capable of, so I tailored the encounter to them.
Second, this fight is stupidly complex by normal 5e standards. I'm heavily influenced by MMOs, so I like crazy intricate boss fights. This is designed based on the assumption that the players will know everything she can do, so the puzzle is just executing rather than discovering how things work. I had a trusted lieutenant who'd been playing both sides for a long time, so he was my narrative excuse to give the players all the information.
Third, the environment was an enclosed tower, 45 feet across by 75 feet long by 80 feet tall. Four pillars stretched from ground to ceiling with torches of white flame on each, facing the center of the room. Torches were also spread evenly along the tower walls with flames of six different colors, two of each color. Here's a picture for reference (ignore the poker chips, we were just using them to track elevation):
https://imgur.com/a/TJrSJoP. The use of these will be explained in the Lair Action section below. You can use whatever colors you want, but I used red, yellow, orange, pink, green, and blue.
The boss herself was Zariel, but I deviated quite a bit from canon lore. In my version, she was a mortal warrior who ascended to being a celestial before falling to become Archduchess of Avernus. As a result, she wavered back and forth between her forms, following a pattern of Devil, Mortal, Angel, Mortal, and then repeat. She has different abilities based on what form she is currently in, and the transformation takes place at the beginning of each of her turns. Rather than deal with minions to balance action economy, I just gave her four turns, one after each of the players.
Without further ado, here she is.
Stats Size: Large
HP: 400
AC: 21
Speed: 90 feet (flying)
Primary Stats: Str +8, Dex +6, Con +10, Int +8, Wis +8, Cha +10
Senses: True Sight
Immunities: Devil form - fire, poison, necrotic. Angel form - radiant, poison. Mortal form - cold.
Passive Abilities Note - When I say "round" in the descriptions, I mean a full set of turns, regardless of whether that is, for example, round 2 of combat or the second half of round 2 and the first half of round 3.
Regeneration: Zariel heals for 10 HP at the beginning of her turn unless she is at 0 HP or her healing has been disrupted. When Zariel takes on her Angel form, she will not heal if she has received necrotic damage in the last round of combat. When Zariel takes on her Devil form, she will not heal if she has received radiant damage in the last round of combat. When Zariel takes on her Mortal form, she will not heal if she has received force damage in the last round of combat.
Ascendant Rage: When Zariel takes damage, she gains one stack of Rage. She can only gain one stack per source of damage. (Not sure how to word this, but like Scorching Ray = 3 stacks, multiattack = 2 stacks, but attack + smite from a paladin = 1 stack. Generally, multiple rolls = multiple stacks.) Each stack makes Zariel deal 1 additional damage to any creature she damages and makes Zariel take 1 less damage from any source of damage. Zariel loses all stacks of Ascended Rage if she does not take damage from a hostile creature for a full round of combat.
Incapacitation Resistance: Zariel has advantage on any saving throws for which a failure would cause her to be incapacitated. (I did this to avoid her getting locked down too easily, but I didn't want full magical resistance to deny casters doing good damage.)
Legendary Resistance: The standard three uses.
Lair Action Zariel expends the energy in one of the torches around the room, causing the torch to go dark and empowering Zariel in some way. The effect of each is as follows:
- Red: When Zariel is damaged by a melee attack, she can use her reaction to counterattack with Corrupt Soul, Soul Judgment, or Whack, as appropriate for her form at the time. (edited after someone pointed out I forgot to mention the reaction cost)
- Yellow: Zariel's AC is increased by 7.
- Orange: Zariel's attacks automatically hit the target, regardless of her roll (even a nat 1). She can still roll to try to crit.
- Pink: On a successful attack, Zariel's target must make a DC 15 Wisdom saving throw. On a failure, the target experiences the effects of the Confusion spell and can attempt the saving throw again at the end of each of their turns.
- Green: On a successful attack, Zariel's target suffers a -5 penalty to their attack rolls and spell save DC until the end of their next turn. This effect does not stack with itself if the same target is hit multiple times.
- Blue: Zariel casts the spell Sleet Storm, but she is not affected by the spell.
The effect can be dismissed by picking up the other torch of the same color and using it to color the 4 white flame torches in the center.* If successfully dismissed in this way, the colored torch the players were using goes dark, the white flames return to the center torches, and Zariel cannot use that effect again. If Zariel uses a subsequent lair action to change effects rather than having it forcibly dismissed, the power returns to the initial torch and it regains its colored flame.
* I allowed this to happen for free as long as they were adjacent to the white torch they wanted to color. This way, the players were only limited by their movement rather than action economy. Feel free to adjust depending on how much of a stickler you are for the rules.
Actions Devil form
- Multiattack: Zariel can attack twice with Exploit the Defenseless, twice with Corrupt Soul, or once with each.
- Exploit the Defenseless: +12 to hit, 3d6+6 necrotic damage. This ability automatically crits if the target is Defenseless (see Angel form below).
- Corrupt Soul: +12 to hit, 2d12+8 necrotic damage. On a hit, the target becomes Corrupted. Corruption can be cleansed by splashing the character with holy water or any other means the DM feels like allowing.
- Wall of Fire: Just the standard spell.
- Immolating Gaze: 120 foot range, 4d6 fire damage and ignited (1d10 fire damage at start of turn until fire is put out), DC 18 Wisdom save for half damage.
Angel form
- Soul Judgment: +12 to hit, 3d8+6 radiant damage. This ability automatically crits if the target is Corrupted (see Devil form above).
- Safe and Secure: Zariel removes any temporary afflictions or conditions ailing her and teleports to an unoccupied location of her choice within 30 feet.
- Stupor: The target must make a DC 20 Charisma saving throw. On a failure, the target is charmed by Zariel, falls prone, and begins worshiping her. They are considered Defenseless. The charm and Defenseless conditions can be removed by speaking to the target and reminding them of an important moment, as an aid for them to recall their true self. (This was put in as a way to make my players remember stuff the other people had done during the campaign for the sake of reminiscing. It seemed fitting for the final session.)
- Master of the Skies: Bolts of lightning arc out from Zariel toward all other creatures in flight. Targets must make a DC 20 Dexterity saving throw or be knocked to the ground, taking 2d10 lightning damage plus any applicable falling damage. On a success, a target takes only half the lightning damage and is able to remain airborne.
Mortal form
- Multiattack: Zariel can use Whack three times, plus one additional time for each 100 HP she is missing.
- Whack: +12 to hit, 1d12+8 whatever damage matches the weapon you want her to have.
- Intimidation: Creatures within 20 feet of Zariel must make a DC 20 Wisdom saving throw. On a failure, the creature had disadvantage on all attacks made on Zariel, and Zariel has advantage on all attacks against the creature. Creatures who fail this saving throw can attempt it again at the end of each of their turns.
- Imposed Bloodlust: The target must make a DC 18 Wisdom saving throw. On a failure, the target flies into a blinding rage, losing concentration and the ability to cast spells. The target immediately assesses the situation and locks on to the nearest living creature. The target must use its next turn attempting to do as much damage as possible to the target it locked onto.
- Seismic Slam: Zariel flies down and strikes the ground with incredible force. Creatures within 15 feet of her impact position take 1d8 bludgeoning damage for every 10 feet Zariel descended (e.g., 5d8 if she flew down from 50 feet above the ground) and must make a DC 20 Strength saving throw or be knocked prone.
I think that covers everything, so let me know what you think or if you have any questions. Just wanted to share what turned out to be a fun fight for my group.
submitted by frezzyisfuzzy to DnDBehindTheScreen [link] [comments]
You guys got any good stories of douchey wannabe pro players? Gimme your best.
I just had my first experience with one the other night, please share your stories.
Here’s my own one:
It’s my first time back in live poker in almost a year, it’s a well-put together home game. 2 tables running, it’s casual, splashy, drinking, really fun 1/2 game, totally uncapped buyins too. From what I could tell it was a few different groups of buddys, some of whom play much higher or are online grinders.
I’m meeting new people and having fun when this douchenozzle walks in, headphones and sunglasses on, and sits in the 8 seat at my table. I assume since he gets no greetings that he, like me, only knows the host and not any of the players. He buys in for what looks like 3k which is easily the fattest stack by almost double.
In the first few hands he starts criticizing other people’s plays. He literally scoffed at some guys bet sizing DURING THE HAND which he was not in. After the hand he goes ‘hey (hero) did you have JJ in that hand?’ super confidently. Hero says no, then he says ‘oh ok then you had JT, that was super face up to when you led out on the turn’. He was just using a bunch of big poker words together that honestly made no sense.
Now, the other players may be splashy, but they’re not bad and can clearly put other players in super tough spots. So after one big hand this jackass says something along the lines of ‘haha keep playing like that and I’m going to have all of your chips, fish’. The other players at this point had been avoiding action with him clearly until they had a big hand which could dominate him and shut him up, which is exactly what happens.
Villian opens utg+1 to 8, thinking everyone is playing super loose and station-y. Gets called by SB, which is one of the first times his opens have gotten called. Flop is A5T rainbow. SB leads for pot, Villian raises 2x or so. SB calls. Turn is a blank. SB checks, villian makes a small bet. He’s stone cold silent but clearly so so nervous. SB check raises huge, leaving like $80 behind just to taunt the guy. Villain doesn’t even think for a minute and calls. River is another 5, the money goes in, SB turns over TT, villian had AK and gets fucking owned for almost half his stack.
He shuts the fuck up after that. Turns out the host said that the guy doesn’t play much poker but watches a lot of poker vlogs. The host told the guy that the competition was pretty soft at these home games so he invited him. Looked like the guy wanted to be a big shot and thought he could make some dough at this home game. Nope.
submitted by Rotterato to poker [link] [comments]
How do you feel when taking money from degenerate gamblers?
I mostly play tournaments and if there are bad players out there they bust out and I don't see them again. Last night I saw what a degenerate gambler was and it was not pleasant.
A friend in a poker group suggested I play cash because it's easy money compared to micro stakes MTTs. I didn't like cash because it feels boring, there is no development and no thrill. But when my friend doubled his bankroll in 2 days I decided to give it a shot.
I ended up at a table on GG poker with 2 regs and 3 fish who played any 2 cards. One of the fish, from Japan, would call any raise, any bet and any shove. It's as if he had no fold button at all. Other fish had 5-8 buy in stacks and I knew where they came from. Any time they would get a hand like TPTK or above they would shove and stack the poor Japanese guy. He would rebuy and come back. I saw him stacked at least 10 times over an hour. I did win a few pots from all players and left. What I saw was unfair and somewhat predatory.
Is this how it's supposed to work? You find a table with fish and you milk them until they leave? No skill required, just flop 2 pair + and take their chips? Are you supposed to feel good about that?
submitted by strongerplayer to poker [link] [comments]
Patch Notes for Cayo Perico Heist Update 1.52
[December 15, 2020] – New Content in Grand Theft Auto Online - The Cayo Perico Heist has been added to GTA Online. In this update, players are contacted by Miguel Madrazo who will task them with infiltrating one of the most secure private islands in the entire world, evading or neutralizing the heavily armed security forces stationed there, and escaping with valuable evidence along with as much art, gold and drug money as they can carry. Players must scope, prep, and execute the Heist either solo or with up to three other players and will have the opportunity to access several new weapons and vehicles along the way.
- The Cayo Perico Island has been added to GTA Online. The Island consists of several different key locations that players can explore while scoping for the Heist, including a beach party where new DJ collective Keinemusik performs an exclusive set. Upon completing the Heist as leader, players can return to the Cayo Perico beach party at their convenience and invite others along for the journey.
- The Kosatka has been added to GTA Online. The Kosatka is a new driveable Submarine property that acts as a base of operations for planning The Cayo Perico Heist. The Kosatka can be customized with Guided Missiles, a Sonar Station, and a Weapon Workshop. The Kosatka also comes with a Moon Pool where players can store the new Sparrow, Kraken Avisa and Pegassi Toreador vehicles.
- The Music Locker has been added to GTA Online. The Music Locker is a new Nightclub located underground below The Diamond Casino & Resort, which acts as a social hub and is where players can first meet Miguel Madrazo to learn about The Cayo Perico Heist. The Music Locker is also the venue that showcases new DJs added with this update.
- One new DJ has been added to GTA Online. Players can see this new DJ perform at The Music Locker:
- A new feature to toggle strobe lights in The Music Locker has been added. In the Style section of the Interaction Menu, the strobe light toggle can be found, listed as “Music Locker Strobes” and can be toggled on or off.
- New DJ Request Missions have been added to GTA Online for owners of the Casino Penthouse who have completed The Cayo Perico Heist. Players will earn special rewards for completing these requests.
- Two new Radio Stations have been added:
- K.U.L.T 99.1 FM
- Still Slipping Los Santos
- Two existing Radio Stations have been updated with all-new mixes and tracks:
- New Hidden Cache collectibles have been added to GTA Online. Players can find up to 10 Hidden Caches on the ocean floor around San Andreas each day. Players who own the Kosatka Sonar Station can blip the Caches on their radar. Players are rewarded with GTA$ and RP for finding these Hidden Caches.
- Nine new vehicles have been added to GTA Online:
- Kosatka
- Sparrow
- Kurtz 31 Patrol Boat
- Vapid Winky
- Shitzu Longfin
- Kraken Avisa
- Annihilator Stealth
- RO-86 Alkonost
- Pegassi Toreador
- One new weapon, the Military Rifle, has been added to GTA Online and can be purchased from Ammu-Nation stores.
- Additional new weapons have been added to GTA Online and can be unlocked on Cayo Perico.
- Over 180+ items of clothing have been added for both Male and Female characters in GTA Online.
- Over 30+ Tattoos have been added to GTA Online.
- Nine new Face Paints have been added to GTA Online.
- Six new celebration emotes have been added to GTA Online, which can be used while dancing:
- Crowd Invitation
- Driver
- Runner
- Shooting
- Suck It
- Take Selfie
- Several new Awards related to The Cayo Perico Heist have been added to GTA Online, including the opportunity for players to earn up to 1.4 million in bonus GTA$ for various Heist challenges.
- Five new styles of Blackjack tables and four new styles of Three Card Poker tables are available for purchase for players who own a Casino Penthouse and the Private Dealer. They can be purchase from the Casino Shop using Chips and equipped using the Interaction Menu.
GTA Online Fixes
Game Stability and Performance
- Fixed several issues that caused game crashes, freezes and other stability problems
- Fixed a stability issue that caused high memory usage for PC players, which could have led to pausing/stuttering on low specification hardware
- Fixed an issue that may have caused players to get stuck on a black screen during transitions between GTA Online content
Matchmaking & Networking
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players getting stuck on the sky camera after attempting to use the ‘Quick Job’ option to enter a Casino Heist lobby
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players remaining in the same session after using the 'Find New Session’ option
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players getting stuck on a loading screen when accepting a Job invite while inside the Arcade
- Fixed an issue that may have caused network errors during the race portion of the GTA Online Tutorial
- Fixed position sync issues with the Rune Zhaba vehicle when some players in a GTA Online session are running at a high framerate
Content
- Fixed an issue that resulted in the news van getting stuck on a sign stopping Mission progression during the Casino Work Mission – Fake News
- Fixed an issue that caused the Casino Heist Prep Mission – Duggan Shipments to end unexpectedly after launching
- Fixed an issue that caused the Police Van from the Casino Heist Random Encounter – Patrick McReary to appear during an Open Wheel Race
- Fixed an issue that resulted in the Mission starting with 3 seconds on the timer in the Casino Heist Random Encounter – Patrick McReary
- Fixed multiple instances of incorrect button prompts that were present in several Arcade Games on the Japanese version of the game
- Fixed overlapping text that was present in the Arcade Game – QUB3D
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players with restricted accounts being able to see the custom initials of players on the high score screen of Arcade Games
- Fixed an issue that caused the Movie Props Hidden Collectibles to be missing from their intended location
- Fixed an issue that caused Lester’s car to not be drivable in the Heist Mission: Fleeca Job – Scope Out
- Fixed an issue that caused players to be stuck with no functionality in the Heist Mission: Fleeca Job – Scope Out
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players getting stuck after trying to launch the Heist Mission: Fleeca Job – Scope Out
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players being unable to use the skip trip functionality in the in the Heist Mission: Prison Break – Plane
- Fixed incorrect objective text that was present in the Heist Mission: Prison Break – Station
- Fixed an issue that caused players to fall through the map during the Casino Heist – Finale
- Fixed an issue that caused players to be taken into a Casino Heist Mission after not choosing an option on the Next Job Voting Screen, despite having made no Casino Heist progress
- Fixed visual issues that were present after quitting spectator mode during the Adversary Mode – Every Bullet Counts
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players being unable to re-equip rebreathers during the A Superyacht Life Mission – Salvage
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players being unable to use their weapon wheel during the A Superyacht Life Mission – Salvage
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players losing camera functionality in the Gerald’s Last Play Mission – Make Ends Meat
- Fixed a button conflict that was present in the Arena War – Game Masters
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players falling under the map after modding a vehicle in the Arena Workshop Property
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players being unable to deliver Cargo during the Business Battle – Assassination
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players getting stuck on the objective ‘Hack the Security Panel' in the Business Battle – Factory Raid
- Fixed an issue that caused the Mission to instantly fail after launching a Sell Mission
Awards and Daily Objectives
- Fixed an issue that caused the Daily Challenge – 'Participate in the Featured Series' to not register correctly
Properties
- Fixed issues that resulted in players’ Arcade set up progress getting reset
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players getting stuck after drinking at the Arcade bar
- Fixed camera issues that were present when entering the Arcade
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players losing movement functionality after storing the Enus Paragon R (Armored) in their Office Garage
- Fixed helicopter spawning issues on the Yacht
- Fixed visual issues that were present with the Office Garage cutscene
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players being unable to exit their Arcade after accepting an invite
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players getting stuck on a loading screen after driving into the Arena Garage
Vehicles
- Fixed an issue that prevented several variations of vehicle cinematic cameras from appearing for all vehicles
- Fixed an issue that caused the Bravado Gauntlet Classic’s trade price to be displayed incorrectly on the Benny's Original Motorworks site
- Fixed an issue that prevented Cargobob helicopters from being able to pick up the Vapid Peyote Custom using the hook
- Fixed several miscellaneous model and texture issues for the following vehicles:
- Invetero Coquette D10
- Bravado Gauntlet Classic Custom
- Albany Manana Custom
- Vapid Peyote Custom
- Bravado Youga Classic 4x4
Clothing
- Fixed clipping issues that were present with several of the ‘Open Shirts’ and ‘Open Party Shirts’
- Fixed several miscellaneous clipping and texture issues for the following clothing items:
- Animal masks (and other larger mask options)
- Tucked Short Shirt variants
- Untucked Short Shirt variants
- Sport Shorts
- Yacht Captain outfit
Miscellaneous
- Reduced the frequency that the player will receive call, text and email notifications regarding content from previous GTA Online content updates
- Fixed an issue that resulted in vehicles not arriving after being requested from Ms. Baker
- Fixed an issue that resulted in players being unable to interact with certain activities in the Casino
- Fixed an issue that caused the Avenger’s entrance trigger to not be visible to players
- Fixed an issue that resulted in spectators being unable to swap filters
- Fixed an issue where PlayStation 4 players without a PS Plus subscription would not be directed to the correct menu when attempting to access GTA Online
Story Mode
- Fixed an issue that caused some weapon magazines and attachments to be missing during cutscenes
submitted by PapaXan to gtaonline [link] [comments]
Professional Poker Etiquette
I started my gambling career exclusively in private games. If the person running the game doesn't like you, you don't get invited back. I learned this lesson very quickly.
I am going to share some of my ideas to be a good poker player and increase your chances of getting invited back to good games, and I hope some of y'all will share your ideas.
- Never berate other players for their play (and certainly never berate a dealer).
- If someone asks you what you think of their play, give your honest opinion in a nice manner. People will play with stronger players so they can learn from them.
- Do not talk while other players are playing post-flop. It disrupts people's ability to think. And when you are in a hand, do not talk to your opponent unless they talk to you first.
- If someone is steaming or tilting at the table, don't say anything. Leave them alone. We've all been there.
- If an inexperienced player breaks the rules of poker etiquette, don't take it personally. Brush it off. Don't get upset.
- Avoid any shady movements. Don't reach for chips unless betting. Use clear, concise language.
- Keep chips and cards neat and visible so people know how much you are playing with and can see you are in the hand.
- Don't get involved in disputes that have nothing to do with you.
- If a decision needs to be made and it is EV neutral, let the other player choose (running it multiple times etc)
- You don't have to socialize, but a nice disposition goes a long way :)
submitted by readyrummy1 to poker [link] [comments]
Stories from 12 years of Casino Industry
I was asked to make a post about some stories within the Casino grounds so I thought I'd share. I have many so I'll do my best to pick the better ones.
Some back information: I've been a Casino Dealer for 11 years, I've been a supervisor for five years, and I've been a Surveillance Operator for one year. I've worked at three properties, none of which are connected or owned by the same company. I've worked on : Government/Private/Native American owned casinos.
- From Hero to Zero.
At my first Casino, I was one of the first group of people who were trained to deal Roulette . After 4 weeks of working 6PM-3AM then doing roulette training from 3AM-8AM (Not paid) , I actually really enjoyed the game and after about six months I became extremely quick at the number game and the pace of the action was steady with very low margin of errors. Young man walks in, cashes in for $500. He buys in for $2 chips and just loads the board. After a few spins and pretty decent hits, he then changes his chips from $2 to 5$ then to $10 and racks his winnings up to $10,000. It was then, five spins in a row, he loaded the board with some pretty gross bets, and every spin I would hit the ONE number with either NO CHIPS on it, or maybe 1 chip , He lost all $10,000 in a matter of minutes. He leaves , and I go on break. After my break I was going back to the same table and wouldn't you know it, the same young man walks in and cashes in another $500. He tells me he just sold his car outside and this is all that he had left. So we do the same deal, buys in for $2 chips, then slowly starts betting $5 chips, $10, $25...and he makes $10,000 AGAIN. Within the next 25 minutes it was straight agony. Every spin, same thing, he would bet $2500 in chips, and win only $250, $400, and after about a half hour he lost it all . Never saw the guy again.
2) Man down
At this property, we are 24 hours for table games. It's currently 5AM , and I'm dealing some $25 Blackjack to this guy. He's probably early thirties , heavy guy. He's sober as can be, but right away I can tell he's been losing. We know how much you've bought in for, how much your down, or up, and I could see he was down $2000+. After about twenty minutes of pure losing, his temper starts to flare.At this point I now have two other guests at my table. Drinking coffee, not saying a word, just losing their money. After losing hand, after hand, this guy looks me straight in the eye, seized up, starts shaking, he can't move. He tries to punch towards me and smashes his stack of chips all over the place and falls backwards to the floor. I call for security, we cannot touch him due to liability . I can't move from my table because, well, liability / casino cash property, all I can do is try to talk to him. As I'm doing so, these other two woman who are sitting at my table just look at me and one says "OK, dealer, cmon lets go " as she taps the table telling me to start dealing and forget about the guy having a stroke on the floor. As security takes him to the ambulance out front, I had to stay behind for a couple minutes and give a statement. I go on break. I come back, and 45 minutes later, he comes right back in with a oxygen tank and keeps gambling for the remainder of the morning.
3) You get a dildo, and YOU get a dildo!
On a late summer Saturday night, we had a large event for these massive muscle guys/strongman competition type thing. After their show, I'm at the roulette table , and five of these boys come over to play. They were absolutely hilarious. They were feeling pretty good, cashed in somewhat large amounts and I could tell this was going to be a fun time. After about a hour of dealing to these guys, it's almost midnight, everybody is pretty hammered , I spin the ball, and all five of these guys take out these god damn (what I can only tell was) two feet purple dildos from inside their pants, and wiping them around in the air. The ladies were just loving it, one of the dildos landed in the roulette wheel and we had to shut the table down to re-calibrate the wheel to make sure nothing had been changed. I just remember that night was so much damn fun, I couldn't believe what I was seeing and I would never forget it.
4) Full Moon
On this day, I was actually training dealers / supervising them on small games like Three Card poker. We opened the table at 10AM, and this older man came and sat down . He played all day. The jackpot was $21,000 and that was pretty high for this table. He played, and played and played. He's one of the players where you know he's wearing a diaper because he's been drinking coffee/pop all day and hasn't moved in eight hours. As the day went on, this man never moved from his chair. Getting closer to midnight, he was aggravated and said "I need to go have a smoke, I'm getting killed in here". He left, and the very next hand, the lady beside him was dealt the jackpot . He didn't say much, but you could just tell he just hated life at that very moment because had he not gotten up, it would of been his hand. The man calmly took his cane , his hat, jacket, coffee, and left. The next morning I found out when he did leave he drove his car straight through his bank and was arrested.
5) Slick Robber
I actually give props to people who can actually pull this off. This story may confuse you so I'll try and explain things as best as possible. A lot of casinos have machines as soon as you walk through the front doors. A man walks up to one of these machines and sticks in HIS $100 bill. He doesn't gamble it, instead he hits the cash out button and gets a $100 TITO ticket where he then takes the ticket to the ATM machine to get his $100. Now remember, his Original $100 is in the slot machine. He then takes the $100 from the ATM and goes back to the same machine, and repeats this process over a hundred times. Essentially he's taking money from the ATM, and loading up the Slot Machine . Now he knows he can't do it too much because if the slot machine gets full of money, the machine will shut down and the slow attendant will have to take all the cash out. So he deposits over $10,000 , then has a small crowbar, he cracks the machine open and makes a run out the front door. To my knowledge he was never caught . But damn, that was pretty smart .
EDIT:
6) Mental Health is a thing.
10PM man walks in to play some high limit BlackJack. This guy knows the game and played well. Dressed nice, drank juice/tea , a little bit of a attitude, cashed in over $10,000. When this man was half way down his buy in, he said something a long the lines of "If I don't win here tonight, I'm going to go set myself on fire." I wasn't sure if he was serious because when people are down, they tend to say a lot of nonsense. I actually left early that night, and from a third party was told he did exactly that in the parking lot. The next day it was clear something terrible had gone wrong in the parking lot .
EDIT:
7) Nothing good happens after midnight
After a busy Saturday night, I was dealing a mix of games, and during this story I was in the middle of Blackjack. I had one young kid (probably 19) sitting in the middle, one older male probably in his later 40's sitting beside him on his right, and I had a really nice couple in their 20's sitting together at the other side. This young kid wasn't playing just sort of watching, and ever time the old man won he would give this young guy some of his winnings. The older man, was a wine drinker, and he had black between all of his teeth, I'll never forget. He's a little drunk but nothing terrible. As the night goes on, the older man goes and uses the washroom, at which point the couple asked the young guy "Oh was that your dad?" and the young guy says "Hah, no I wish!". The couple and I just looked at each other. This old guy, was in complete control over this kid. Absolutely disgusting. The night ends, and I find out the couple called a few of their friends, and they all waited outside by this old mans truck and beat the living hell out of him. 40 years old, sleeping with a 19 year old, completely brain washed . Very weird.
8) That one co-worker where you just wish they would quit.
One of our co-workers, nice guy but had a very big ego and we as employees just sorta left him alone. One day he had enough of the atmosphere and quit. Now usually when you quit, you cannot come back until you paperwork is finalized. How ever, HR was in that day, and he was given the paperwork the very next day. He came in, cashed in $1000, and made $50,000 in about a hour at the Baccarat table. My manager, was extremely annoyed, because now this guy is just mocking the casino and having the time of his life (Thanks for the big tip by the way :) ) and so he decides to call it quits. He wants to ban himself and he wants $50,000 in cash. The casino says Nope, we are going to give you a cheque. Now here's the thing, most business people will take the cheque, how ever you CANT CASH the cheque until the following monday because it's on that day where the funds are available. The casino on the other hand will cash their own check in anytime , because they want you to play. So this guy pretty much said go to hell I want my cash, and he called the police. Police show up, and management promptly gave him the cash.I though it was absolutely hilarious .
9) No good deed goes un punished
I was dealing Three Card Poker, and the jackpot was around $17,000. This old man (a regular) was sitting there all day grinding it out. Super nice guy, always a pleasure to deal to. Well, after hours of playing, he stands up and says "Hey john!, can you come here for a minute?" so his buddy John comes over. He says to John "I need to go take a piss real quick, can you play my card until I get back?" John agrees . John takes the chips and I stop him and explain he can't play his friends chips, he needs to cash in and play his own. And he does. Welp, second hand out and bam, doesn't he win it. The old man comes back and is so happy, he can't believe it. John, took his $17,000, didn't say a word to his "buddy" and walked away. I never felt so much hatred in all my life. Didn't give him a dollar, not a thank you, nothing. The old man sits back down again, the progressive resets to $2500, and he sat there grinding away again.
10) The Top Knot
I had this player , young guy, who was born into a fortune. One of his relatives passed away and left him a pretty big sizable amount of money, so he played poker every single day for the rest of his days. I will add, he IS a good player. I did not enjoy his company just because of the "Know-it-All" attitude, but he was good. We'll call him John. John is 5'10, and well build, with muscle. John also decided today was the day to show off his Top Knot. (google top knot if you're not sure what I mean) So he sits down, and he's absolutely KILLING the table. Every hand, after hand, after hand. And because he's in such a good mood, he's playing any two cards, calling any $500 bet, and he's just dominating. This one guy at the table decided he had enough. He got up, without saying a word and left. A moment later, he comes back in, walks behind John, and takes a pair of scissors , and cuts off his Top Knot. I for one couldn't believe it, dying laughing inside, and it just turned into one big brawl. That was a good day.
11) That one bad seed
One of my best friends who I haven't seen in YEARS ended up being part of the crew. Was kind of nice to catch up. We never really got along as we grew up because he has a very high picture of himself . He wanted that 10/10 woman. A mansion, and a new Corvette. So every month or so we would all go up to the other casino to play. I myself would bring no more than $500, but I couldn't understand how this guy (we'll call him Kyle) was spending THOUSANDS of dollars at the tables. So this wen on for a few months. Well, one day, as we're closing the casino, he and I are in the High Limit room and we're getting ready to close the tables. We are told to take the chips out, count them, put them back, sign this piece of paper and that's it. Well as the supervisor was locking the tray, the piece of paper fell to the floor, so she asked Kyle to grab the piece of paper. As he bends over, a great big $500 chip falls right out of his sock. Kyle was fired immediately , but it all made sense. They offered Kyle a deal where if he replaced all the stolen chips they would not make it public. Not sure how that turned out.
12) If I ever decide to write a book, this will be the last chapter: <3
After working at my first Casino for five years, I met a Indian woman who was visiting from another part of the country. During this time I was explaining a game to her, which honestly I don't think she even cared. She explained she was visiting and sight seeing , and that was that.Well, two years later I ended up moving to the other side of the country and transferred casinos, and low and behold she worked there as a Dealer. We got married , and it's been 5 years.
13) The Tip
One of our tables that we've had for a couple years had a progressive jackpot that had reached $100,000. The dealer at the table was sitting pretty lonely. Nobody really played the game because people knew it was extremely difficult to win the jackpot. My memory is a tad foggy, but you somehow needed to flop the royal flush. This young guy sits down and says to the dealer, we'll call him John. "John, if you pay me that jackpot, I will tip you $10,000" Well John started dealing, and about a half hour into his shift, he F*cking did it. He dealt him the royal. And you know something?This young lad, kept his word, and he made sure there was a audience, and he tipped exactly $10,000. That was a moment right there. That pay cheque was real nice. I think we all got about $500 more than usual. The moment that jackpot was awarded they got rid of the table because the money it was making was not near what the casino wanted. I'm sure there have been bigger tips at other casinos, but that was something special .
14) The Lawsuit
Now this story I'm going to have to beat around the bush a bit due to the nature of what happened. I can't won't answer any questions that you may have on this topic other than what I have to say because it had a lot of publicity . The waitresses at this casino had to wear very thin sexy clothes. Not borderline legal, but it was noticed. One day they called all the waitresses to come in and explained they were changing their outfit to something even more sexier. Now these new dresses were very very borderline legal . The staff said No way. We're not wearing that.So , friday night comes, and the staff work their whole shift, then at the end of their shift were called into a meeting and were all fired. Welp, one of those ladies father was a pretty big time lawyer. Brough the casino to court and won. They won big. Good for them. We had no waitresses for a couple days haha.
Thanks for reading along, I have many more I can add as the day goes on, those were just some off the top of my head. Feel free to ask any questions of the Casino industry. I don't really have many stories about the surveillance department because that's the one area where I can't really say a whole lot due to its privacy and contracts I was and still am under.
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What's your style?
I was watching some old Team Covenant videos and noticed that players have all sorts of ways to keep track of clicks, credits, and so on.
I'm currently using poker chips to track clicks, and all the regular cardboard tokens for credits and viruses. I saw someone track credits with a d20 which I thought was a neat approach that I might try.
As a runner, I usually say which central server I'm running, or point to whichever remote.
What's your style?
submitted by howaboutaboardgame to Netrunner [link] [comments]
League and Poker - learning to lose
I want to preface this post by saying I’m a complete noob at league. I’m 25 and just started playing in the past few months and am currently bronze. However, I’ve been playing poker for years and know a thing or 2 about losing ‘winnable’ situations.
I saw a post earlier today asking how to improve when being up 5+ kills, 50cs, first tower, etc. etc. If you’re that far ahead, you’re going to win more often then not. To quantify, probably 70,80%+ of the time. But 100% of the time? Never. Nothing you do in league will guarantee a win until a team surrenders or the nexus is destroyed.
So how does this correlate to poker? In poker you’re constantly looking to get your money in ahead/ as a favorite. A dream situation for poker players is getting pocket aces- and piling in money as quickly as possible. Worst case scenario you’re a 78% favorite to win before the flop. Other situations you’re an even bigger favorite- sometimes 85/90/98% favorite before the river (the last card that runs out on the board). However, any good player knows that nothing is guaranteed. You can play a hand perfect- get your stack of chips in as a massive favorite- and still lose.
Combining these 2 thoughts we see what pro players in both games do; and that’s put themselves in the best possible situations and accept the results.
Recognizing high points in losses and low points in wins. Taking solace knowing you played a situation near perfectly and got unlucky or being able to self- critique are valuable tools in constantly improving. Remember that for every game you’re an 80% favorite to win and lose, there will probably be an identical situation where you’re getting smacked with a 80% chance to lose- yet somehow clutch it out or get carried to win.
All we can do when playing is our best- and if you play better then your opponent you’ll win more often then not.
submitted by NomNomNomNomNomm to summonerschool [link] [comments]
For beginners: So you've learned the basic rules of poker... Now what?
submitted by PM_BAD_BEAT_STORIES to poker [link] [comments]
Poker at bandit
Not sure if this has been suggested before or how it could be implemented but I could see poker at Bandit being super fun.
Maybe you could buy chips at Bandit with scrap and vice-versa, so if you get a big win trade your chips back for some bulk scrap.
I can see an NPC "handing" out a cards but only visible to the player then just a menu.
Idk lemme know what you think.
submitted by Nattg763 to playrust [link] [comments]
‘We just annihilated them’: Revisiting the 2000 Giants’ NFC title game rout - The Athletic
Ernie Accorsi is a wreck during games. The long-time football executive, best known for his tenure as general manager of the New York Giants from 1998 to 2007, can barely stand to watch the action on Sundays. “You’re helpless up there,” he says of watching games from the press box. “You’re totally helpless.”
Typically, during his most nervous moments, Accorsi would head down to the ground level of a stadium and walk the corridors, periodically peering in through the tunnels to check what was happening on the field — determining the rest by crowd noise.
Twenty years ago, Accorsi had the most relaxing fourth quarter of his life as an executive. During the NFC Championship Game at Giants Stadium, he ditched the sterile press box, headed down to field level and, instead of pacing, stood proudly in the tunnel taking in the scene. The Giants, underdogs that day, were leading the visiting Vikings, 41-0.
“Standing there in the tunnel, just feeling the electricity in the crowd because they knew it, they were chanting ‘Super Bowl,’” Accorsi remembers, “that was one of the great feelings I’ve ever had in my life.”
Entering the 2000 season, the Giants were nobody’s idea of an NFC contender. They had missed the playoffs the previous two seasons and five of the previous six. They hadn’t won a playoff game since Phil Simms and Lawrence Taylor wore blue, and head coach Jim Fassel was coaching for his job in his fourth season. That tension reached its zenith the week of Thanksgiving. A promising start had crashed in back-to-back home blowout losses, first to the frontrunning Rams and then to the mediocre Lions. The morning before Thanksgiving, New York was 7-4, in third in the NFC East, and thanks to tiebreakers on the outside of the NFC playoff picture. John Fox, defensive coordinator: The team was pretty low after that game with Detroit … I can remember at the team prayer after that game thinking, “God, we’re not very good.”
Fassel: Every team has ups and downs. It’s the way you handle it as a coach. You’ve got to have a, I don’t know, a belief to each other about what we’re going to do. I believed in those guys. I believed that we had that. I told the coaches that we’re going to remain positive.
In his Wednesday gathering with the media, Fassel expressed that belief memorably. “If you’ve got the laser, put it right on my chest, I’ll take full responsibility. I’m raising the stakes right now,” he said. “If this is a poker game, I’m shoving my chips to the middle of the table. I’m raising the ante. Anybody who wants in can get in, anybody who wants out can get out: This team is going to the playoffs.” The New York Times called it “a passionate, unsolicited and wholly uncharacteristic speech” from “the Mister Rogers of football.” Bob Papa, radio broadcaster: Everybody viewed it as a little shocking, which gave it more credence. That’s something that (Bill) Parcells would do, or a coach with a different disposition would do. It was out of character for Fassel, and that helped it carry more weight and resonate with everybody inside the building.
Fassel: It’s our job (as coaches) to make the adjustments. That’s
our job. So I put it on the coaches, and the players knew that I put it on the coaches. And I included myself, you know?
Accorsi: He put himself on the line. In a situation like we were in, I never worried about if somebody stirs something up. If everything’s going smoothly and we’re 9-1, don’t disturb the waters. But in that kind of situation, throw caution to the wind. I’m not saying that was the reason, but it turned out that it helped us because it got us stimulated. It caught everybody’s interest.
Fox: Our team did respond. It was like, “OK, our leader has said he’s all-in, so we better be all-in.”
Keith Hamilton, defensive tackle: He didn’t mess around. Him coming out saying that meant a lot to the team, it uplifted everybody. I remember practice was upbeat, and we took care of business.
Papa: I thought it was a stroke of genius by Fassel to do it as they were getting ready to play the Cardinals, who weren’t a very good team. It was the perfect game to give the team confidence. He pressed the exact right button at the right time.
The Giants beat backup quarterback Dave Brown in Arizona, 31-7, that weekend, then upset Washington on the road 9-7 the following week when Eddie Murray missed a late field goal. Accorsi: If Murray makes that kick, I don’t think we make the playoffs.
The Giants stretched their winning streak to five to close out the season with victories over the Steelers, Cowboys and Jaguars. Thanks to second-half swoons by St. Louis and Minnesota, the Week 17 win over Jacksonville clinched home-field advantage for New York. The Giants dispatched the division-rival Eagles for a third time that season in the Divisional Playoff, setting up an NFC Championship Game against the Vikings. Although the road team, Minnesota was favored by two points. “(The Giants) surprised me, I think they’ve surprised everybody,” John Madden said pregame on the Fox broadcast. “The keyword is they’ve done it as a team … Today they’ve got to do more than that.” Jessie Armstead, linebacker: Going into that game, they were saying nobody could stop that offense.
The Vikings had a 1,500-yard rusher in Robert Smith, two 1,000-yard receivers in Randy Moss and Cris Carter and a Pro Bowl quarterback in Daunte Culpepper. Fassel: I thought we could beat them. I thought it was going to be a close game.
Accorsi: If you look at that offensive lineup, I kidded John Fox: “The Vikings score 400 touchdowns between midnight and 8 in the morning when I try to sleep.” Fox turned to me and said, “We might shut them out.”
Fox: We matched up pretty good. Our defensive front was very good, so I thought we could handle the run game pretty well. They had two big wideouts, we had two big corners.
They had a little bit of a tendency where when they were in shotgun it would be a pass and when the quarterback was under it was run. So we had a couple of automatics in the game based on that backfield set that would permit us to play an extra guy in the box. That was pretty advantageous to us as well.
Fassel: I really thought in my head, these guys think they’re coming in here to kick our ass, and that ain’t gonna happen. I did stuff to jab our team. I wanted to make sure my team understood this is the highest scoring team in the league and everybody’s betting on them. To use that kind of thing. They’re betting on them, they’re gonna kick our ass. And had fun with it.
Hamilton: We knew they couldn’t beat us. The coaching staff knew they could not beat us. We were confident.
That confidence existed on the other side of the ball, as well. While the media posited that a characteristically cold and windy day at Giants Stadium would behoove the home team, offensive coordinator Sean Payton was praying for better weather. When he saw a mild forecast, he confidently told his offense it could hang a hundred on Minnesota’s defense. He dubbed it “Air Force week,” building a game plan around quarterback Kerry Collins’ arm rather than the team’s traditional running game. 📷Amani Toomer finished the game with six catches for 88 yards and a touchdown. (Stan Honda / AFP via Getty Images)
Papa: He thought the Giants could pass all over the Vikings. We started to get a sense they were licking their chops. Talking to the players, they couldn’t wait.
Fassel: I could see it; I knew we were good the way we warmed up, the way we talked. And it was good we could play at our place.
Giants Stadium was packed with fans waving white towels well before the 12:30 p.m. kickoff, riled up by honorary captains Lawrence Taylor, Harry Carson and Ottis Anderson — who spent the rest of the day on the sidelines with the team. Accorsi: It was electric in there. It really was.
Fox: A lot of people don’t realize that’s way more electric than the Super Bowl. It doesn’t have the meaning of the Super Bowl, but as far as the stadium atmosphere with real fans, it’s pretty wild.
Armstead: You had all the legends. You realize you weren’t just playing for yourself. When you go to the sidelines, those guys were out on the field and you had to perform.
Hamilton: Looking at Lawrence Taylor and looking at Harry Carson, you can’t even make that up. They’re on the sidelines; that’s a dream come true. That’s everything. I don’t know how to put that into words.
It was the offense that set the tone, though. Winning the toss and electing to receive, the Giants marched 74 yards on four plays, culminating in Collins’ 46-yard vertical seam touchdown strike to Ike Hilliard. The Vikings fumbled the ensuing kickoff, New York defensive back Lyle West recovered, and Collins hit fullback Greg Comella on a wheel route for another touchdown on the next play. In 143 seconds, the Giants were up 14-0. Hamilton: That gave us a jolt. We weren’t used to the offense doing too much.
Armstead: Our thing was, if our offense scores 17 points, we’ll win the football game.
Papa: Everything they talked about during the week was starting to unfold. But you were still incredulous because you kept waiting for the Vikings to get their mojo going, and it never happened.
Fox: It was 14-0 and I’m not sure anybody had broken a sweat yet.
“I don’t think in their wildest dreams could they have dreamt this,” said Madden on the broadcast. The onslaught did not stop there. The Giants hounded Culpepper into quick throws and frustrated Moss and Carter with physical coverage. And the “Air Force” approach continued on offense, as Collins meticulously picked apart the Minnesota defense in a first half for the ages. He hit Joe Jurevicius in the back of the end zone to make it 24-0 early in the second quarter. “This is unbelievable!” said Madden. Pat Summerall added, “I thought the Giants had a chance, but wow!” 📷Joe Jurevicius had just two catches for 15 yards but one went for a touchdown. (Ezra O. Shaw / Allsport)
With the seconds ticking down in the first half, Collins found Hilliard for a second time in the end zone for a 34-0 lead. Collins finished the half 23-of-34 for 338 yards and four touchdowns — already a franchise record for passing yards in a playoff game (and 101 more yards, incidentally, than Collins combined for in New York’s two other playoff games that season). On Fox, Terry Bradshaw called it “the most impressive half of football by a quarterback and an offense I’ve ever seen.” It was a validating performance for Collins — and for the team that signed him at his low point. He had been the fifth overall pick in the 1995 draft by Carolina, leading the Panthers to the NFC Championship Game in his second season. But by the time he was a free agent, he’d been waived by Carolina, had played poorly in a cameo with New Orleans, had battled alcoholism and been accused of racism. Fassel got emotional talking about Collins’ performance that day. Fassel: It was fabulous. I’ll tell you this: Some of this stuff coming back to me really means a lot. Kerry was out. People cut him, we picked him up, and nobody really thought Kerry Collins was going to be a great quarterback. He was just amazing. He came in and he was a leader. He played so confidently, like “This is my game, guys, I’ve got them.” And that carried to the whole team.
The 34-point halftime lead remains the largest in the history of the NFC Championship Game. Hamilton: That was amazing. I couldn’t have been prouder of the preparation that went into the game, the things (the offense) did, and they excelled. They just took off.
Fox: Payton had said (before the game), “How many you gonna need?” I told him 31. Well it was 34-0 and we were running in and he said, “Is that enough?” I said, “Hell no!”
Fassel: I told Fox (at halftime), “If they score 35 points, you’re fired!”
Armstead: Nobody’s going to come back on our defense at 34-0. That’s impossible. There was no way with the guys we had on that defense that we’d tolerate 14 points, nevertheless 34.
Culpepper fumbled on the first play of the second half, with Collins throwing a fifth TD pass moments later, this time to Amani Toomer. “The Viking defense looks like it’s chairs,” said Madden. Later, he added, “The Giants have broken the Minnesota Vikings’ will.” Hamilton: There’s no question. You’ve been fighting a man all day for a couple hours, the look in their eyes is a different look. Ain’t no colorful words for it. They know when it’s time to go home.
📷The Giants sacked Culpepper four times and intercepted him three times. (Ezra Shaw / Allsport)
Collins was replaced by backup Jason Garrett with 12:53 remaining in the fourth quarter; the Giants proceeded on a 19-play drive to run out the clock. It’s tied for the seventh-largest margin of victory in an NFL playoff game in the Super Bowl era. An underdog has never won by more. Armstead: We were mad at Coach Fassel. We were like, “Hey, let’s get 50!”
Fassel: I don’t think I’ve ever been in a game like that … We just annihilated them. It wasn’t luck, it wasn’t like at the last minute. We just kicked their butt right from the beginning.
Armstead: You know how hard it is to win a ballgame in the National Football League, to be in the playoffs against a team that was predicted to be in the Super Bowl — to beat them 41-0 was the most amazing thing about it.
Papa: I’ll say to this day, it’s the greatest win and the greatest performance by a Giants team in the history of that stadium.
Fox: Watching them construct that stage at the end of the game, I can remember looking at my three sons saying, “We’re going to the freakin’ Super Bowl!” Everybody in the league — whether you’re a coach, scout, an administrator, an owner, a player — that’s your goal: to go to the Super Bowl.
Hamilton: Just to be a part of that, in that atmosphere, the fans were happy because they came to the game to watch a winner. I was happier for them than for me.
Armstead: We were on a real high. I wish we could have played that following week against Baltimore.
The high, of course, didn’t last. Two weeks later in the Super Bowl, Collins was intercepted four times and the Giants didn’t score an offensive point against the record-setting Ravens defense. They lost Super Bowl XXXV, 34-7. Accorsi: As a franchise that has won four Super Bowls, that’s why that team doesn’t have a great legacy.
But for one day, they were as good as the Giants had ever been. Fassel: One thing, as a coach, when the guys go out and play so good, you do have to think to yourself: I guess I handled them pretty good this week.
submitted by cornbread36 to G101SafeHaven [link] [comments]
Poker Quest major update - version 42 alpha!
| Biggest update in months - Version 42 is now up on our Website, and Steam! Screenshot Steam: https://store.steampowered.com/app/1184820/Poker_Quest/ Web: https://playsaurus.com/PokerQuest.html Poker Quest v42 (Feb. 2, 2020): * NEW ANIMATED EFFECTS! In the Steam version, there are new animated combat effects for attacks, enflame, curse, etc. * NEW HERO: The Ninja! * NEW GUILD SKILL: "Alchemy". It allows you to re-fill an additional consumable item at campsites. * NEW ENHANCEMENT RELIGIONS: Faces, Reds, Blacks, Odds, and Evens. * IMPORTANT CHANGE: When starving, you no longer lose 20 life per step. You now lose 10 life, and 2 energy per step. * Blacksmiths are now cheaper to upgrade subsequent items (starting at 3 chips instead of 6) * Casual points are no longer limited to 10,000. You can spend as many points as you have XP for. Your points have been reset, so * Limited the XP bonus upgrade in casual mode to 50% instead of 100%, so that it doesn't compete with Hardcore mode. * You can now remove the "Counterattack" and "Stormskin" abilities during combat, in case they would get you killed. * You can now charm and hex your own items. * New keyboard button for "invert card selection" (default X). Selects the opposite cards from what you've already selected. * You can now select multiple cards to use items like Poison Brooch (which take one card and are re-usable). * You can now Charm and Hex your own items. * Charm no longer steals cards that go into frozen items, it only works when the items actually activate. * Hotkeys now return items from stashes. * Vampire can now acquire food. She still cannot eat it, though. * Reduced Vampire's max life from 110 to 80. * Reduced Vampire's lifesteal from 25% to 20%. * Reduced Queen of Spades' max life from 100 to 90. * Poison Brooch no longer upgrades to 4 uses per turn. Queen of Spades starts with two. * The Queen's Flower no longer has Confounded. * Toad's hop ability energy cost reduced from 10 to 8. * Tavern reveals no longer disappear after moving forward on the map * Hexing no-card items now works correctly * Doctor now costs 5 chips instead of 7. * Starving with Regeneration no longer kills you if you have more than 17 life. * Loot world daily runs (rare) will now spawn the same items for every player. * Casinos no longer take life away during practice runs with world modifiers like "Hearts". * Fixed Stone Skin, it is now reusable and gives items to the enemy correctly. * When Confounded, Cursed items that were used will no longer damage you if you refresh them. submitted by Fragsworth to PokerQuest [link] [comments] |
My Nerf Game Plan (looking for suggestions/opinions)
Hey all,
My fiance and I recent got *really* into Nerf (and off-brand "Nerf"). Around a year ago, we were playing with our nephews (4 and 5 y.o.) who have a bunch of blasters, and when my brother-in-law told me that they have basically standardized the dart size for most blasters, it piqued my interest. Also, I thought the bolt action on the Adventure Force Alpha Rogue was really cool, and given that they were super cheap, I went out and bought two of them for my fiance and I to play with.
Fast-forward to this Christmas when my fiance got us the Disruptor twin pack. I was so impressed with them that I decided to see what Nerf reviewers on YouTube would think. That very quickly exposed me to a variety of blasters that I was interested in. Now, through a combination of driving (sometimes up to an hour away) around to stores and sellers found on craigslist/Facebook Marketplace, we have amassed over 50 blasters that shoot darts, mega darts, discs, and rounds. I love them all. The only thing I've been avoiding is battery-operated blasters (I'll explain if anyone cares to know why).
We reached a point fairly early on where I decided I had to *do* something with these things aside from buying them exclusively to play in our relatively small living space. So, I came up with a some rules (many, I'm sure, are widely used already) and plans to host Nerf games once this whole pandemic thing is well-enough under control that it would be safe to do so.
Who Will Be Playing
I created a private FB group and invited our personal friends and family, and I'll encourage them to invite people provided we don't exceed our capacity (TBD, but I have a rough idea).
Where We Will Play
This is probably the trickiest part. The two local rec centres will not be available; one does not do private rentals, and the other requires cost-prohibitive insurance coverage. However, there are a number of "halls" that are possibilities. I spoke to the person who does booking for one of these places, and she thought it sounded like a great idea, and probably workable at her location. I also just learned that schools will rent out their gymnasiums, but I'm not sure what limitations or requirements there might be. I happen to work at an elementary school, so I might be able to work something out if I talk to to principal. This thing won't be happening for a while, so I'm not too concerned about nailing this down now. I'm just happy to know that there are local options. I do not want to play outdoors, mostly because I'd like to be able to collect as much ammo as possible, and also not have to worry about weather.
What Rules We Will Play With
This is where it gets a little weird. I have a few different ideas, but I'm most interested in one: Pooled Health games. I've been fortunate enough to run a few games like this with the kids at the after-school daycare program I work at, and it's been a blast, even though we're limited to using the small gym. It works like this: Each team must stay on their side of the gym (like dodgeball, but I split the gym longways due to the blasters being relatively weak (the one's I bring to daycare). At the back wall of each side is a pile of poker chips (red team and blue team). When you get tagged, you put a hand up (so nobody shoots you), get a poker chip, bring it to the designated "out" area, then tap on your back wall to re-enter the game. This prevents players from ever having to sit out, which is great for kids because they can be impatient. I'll probably also do "elimination" games where each player keeps a number of poker chips in their pocket, and is "out" when they loose their last one. When I'm able to have my bigger games, I'd like to have either mats or even large cardboard sheets (folded) for cover.
Which Blasters We Will Use
I admit that I'm almost definitely setting my expectations too high for the level of complexity people will tolerate when it comes to game prep, and I'll come up with some simpler rule set at least for the first few times that we play. Still, I can't help but to over-think this and try to find a way to make almost every kind of blaster fit in somehow. Basically, I'd like to use a "shop" system where I'll decide upon a limit for how many "points" can be spent on blasters and ammo. My system is far from perfect, but I want it to be something that can be applied with relative ease to any blaster. A blaster's "cost" is determined by its ammo type, it's "ready to fire" capacity, and its storage capacity. A basic Elite-sized dart is worth one point, mega darts are worth two (getting hit with one counts as two points of damage), discs count as half a point (because they are slow... but I love them), and rounds count as 1.5 (because of their speed), and missiles are five (five points of damage, plus I have a rule with them regarding taking down cover). Any "storage" ammo is calculated by dividing the total point value in half-- a recent modification that I was avoiding, but felt compelled to deal with once we got the Heracles (5 ready, 10 storage) as it would have had the same value as the Roundhouse (15 ready) which doesn't make any sense. Additional ammo can be "purchased" for the storage value. I need to consider that it's unlikely that most other players will be as reckless in their spending on a vast Nerf arsenal as I have been, so they may need to make up points by having an excess of ammo. Also, I'd like to use a variety of blasters, so I don't want to make games strictly "dart", "rival", or "disc", although I do have enough blasters to share with quite a few people. Side note: All of these considerations have been for springers only. I want to allow players to use flywheelers if they want, but I'll need to come up with a way to balance them so that they aren't the only viable blasters.
When I first came up with this system and started using it with my fiance at home, our highest capacity blaster was the X-Shot Crusher (maybe my favourite blaster) which has a 35 dart chain. So, I was setting our max point limit at 40, allowing Crusher users to have a side-arm as the chain is a little cumbersome to reload. Then, about a week ago, we scored a fully-loaded Rival Hades for $50 (CAD), which, according to my system, has a point value of 90-- way above any maximum we've been using. Rather than increasing the maximum, I decided that you can go over the max under two conditions: 1) You only use one blaster, and 2) You take a 1HP penalty for going over, then an addition 1HP penalty for every 10 points that you go over. We've done a few of our living room games like this, and it has felt reasonably fair.
To mirror our living room games, I'm envisioning that each team will have a boxed off (with cardboard walls or mats) corner where spare blasters will be kept. These will be blasters that are part of each player's current "loadout", so players can go back there to swap out as they want or to take ammo from their stockpile. The only limitation is that only one player can go back there at once.
If all of this sounds ridiculous, that's fine. For what it's worth though, I've been slowly patching together an app that will streamline the "shopping" process. My fiance and I have just been using a white board to do the math by hand, referring to a spreadsheet I made on my phone, and it doesn't take too long. Realistically, I'll probably end up telling players to bring whatever they want (stock only), and then I'll divide the teams to make things a fair as possible. It's just fun to come up with this stuff. What do you think? Totally nuts? Any suggestions for tweaking my system? I feel like I'm going a little nuts with this Nerf craze while having very few outlets to get that energy out-- daycare with the kids and 1-on-1 living room games with the fiance is pretty much it. I'm interested to hear the thoughts of anyone who bothered to read through any of this wall of a post. Thanks for your time, folks!
submitted by MoonJellyGames to Nerf [link] [comments]
I combined my meta currency and progression systems and I'd like to get your feedback.
Hi y'all, I'd like to get some feedback on my game's meta-currency and progression system. I want to know:
- Do you find this system easy and intuitive to understand?
- Do you think this system would require too much bookkeeping?
- Do you think this system achieves its goals?
The goals of the system:
- To represent the fiction of PCs growing as people by facing adversity. And to represent the cycle of trouble,
- To encourage the players to make interesting characters with beliefs and flaws that make their lives more dramatic.
- To give the players more narrative control and allow for more collaborative storytelling (to an extent.)
Context on the game
- Conceptually: This is a dark retro Sci-Fi game where the player play as "Vagabonds." Vagabonds are badass misfits with dramatic and complicated lives who travel from place to place solving (or causing) problems. The game is about how they change the world and how it changes them.
- Mechanically: The game uses a d20, pbta adjacent system. When a player does something risky and uncertain they roll a d20 and add their stat. If the result is 17 or higher > positive outcome (extra positive on a natural 20.) If the result is a 10-16 > mixed outcome. If the result is a 9 or less > negative outcome (extra negative for a natural 1.) There are no classes or levels, characters are defined by stats and abilities.
Here's how the system works:
ADVERSITY POINTS: - Every player has a pool of Adversity Points (AP.) APs represent the PC's reserve of grit and their ability to learn from adversity. APs are a resource that the players can spend to affect the narrative and mechanics of the game. Only the players have AP, the Guide does not have AP.
Starting Adversity Points: - Players start each session with a minimum of 1 AP. Players that ended the previous session with more than one AP then you get to start the session with that number of AP instead.
Maximum Adversity Points: - Players may only ever have a maximum of 5 AP
- When a player has 5 AP they cannot gain any more.
Tracking Adversity Points: - Players must track their current amount of AP, when they gain or spend AP they must update their current AP to reflect it.
- The group may choose to use physical trackers like coins or poker chips to track AP, but there is also a space on the character sheet to track a player's current AP.
Gaining Adversity Points: Players can gain AP in two different ways: 1) By accepting a Guide intrusion: - The Guide can offer one or more players an intrusion. An intrusion is a minor twist or complication in the narrative that will make the PCs' lives harder or more complicated.
- Each player who would be affected by the intrusion has the option to accept or deny the intrusion (If the intrusion affects multiple PCs then every player affected needs to accept it.)
- If the player accepts the intrusion then the Guide must reward them with an AP (if the intrusion is particularly big the Guide may instead reward the players with 2 or even 3 AP instead.)
2) By triggering a trait: - Every PC has two traits, one ideal, and one flaw.
- Players get to create their PC's traits during character creation.
- To trigger a trait a PC must act in a way that makes their life more difficult or complicated whilst being motivated by or acting in accordance with that trait.
- The Player of the PC or anyone else at the table can bring up that they think that the player has triggered a trait, if the Guide agrees then they must award the player with an AP (if the trigger was particularly dramatic or meaningful the Guide may instead reward 2 or even 3 AP.)
Spending Adversity Points: PC's spend AP for one of the following benefits: 1) Upgrade the result of a roll: - After a player makes a roll, but before the Guide describes its outcome. The player can spend an AP to upgrade the outcome of the dice roll by one step.
- A player can only upgrade a die result once.
2) Activate an ability: - Certain abilities a PC may have may require an AP to activate.
- If an ability requires an AP to activate it will state that fact in its description.
3) Add a detail to the narrative: - A player can spend an AP to add an interesting or convenient detail to the narrative and make it true.
- The player must negotiate the addition with the rest of the table before they can spend the AP. If someone declines the addition then the player does not spend the AP and the detail does not become true.
- (It is important that people try to be as open to additions as possible and only decline an addition when is particularly unreasonable or inappropriate.)
When a player spends an AP they must also tick a segment on the Advancement Clock. (Thiswill be explained below.)
ADVANCEMENT - Vagabonds become stronger by facing and overcoming adversity.
The Advancement clock: - PCs have an advancement clock, this is a clock with 6 segments that tracks how a character is progressing.
Ticking the advancement clock: - When a player spends an AP they must tick a segment on the advancement clock.
- When the player ticks the 6th and final segment they may take an advance.
- When a player ticks the final segment they must also erase all the ticks so that they can start ticking the clock again.
Taking an advance: When a player takes an advance they can choose one of the following benefits. - Increase an attribute rating by +1: The player can choose an attribute rating and increase it by +1. No attribute rating can be raised above +5.
- Acquire a new ability: A player can choose an ability to acquire. To take a rank 2 or 3 ability the player must first have the lower rank ability or abilities it's ability tree.
Thanks for reading, I'd love to hear your feedback :)
submitted by ElendFiasco to RPGdesign [link] [comments]
Live poker stories?
I've been missing live poker so I thought we could share some stories.
About 4 years ago at a casino in San Diego I sat down at what seemed like a friendly 1/2 table. I've only been playing off and on for about 3-4 months at this point and I was still very new to the game as you'll be able to tell soon. Casino was very small it only had about 8 or so tables. I managed to build a $200 stack to $500 after some lucky get there's and a few horrendous bluffs that somehow worked. After about 3 hours I decided it was time to rack up my win when I look down at pocket aces UTG...
I open to $25(lol) this middle aged Muslim guy who I took maybe 3 ~$50 pots from stares me down for a solid minute and makes the call one other player comes along who has been having a rough night was down maybe $500 or so makes a sigh call.
Three ways to a flop of J 8 3 rainbow. I bet $100 (lol) I was really bad at bet sizes back then old Muslim guy insta jams for $300 and the guy behind insta jams for less. I didn't think for too long before making the call thinking "he has KJ or QQ" (again lol). Before the turn is even dealt Muslim guy slams pocket jacks on the table and screams at me "ACES NO GOOD MOTHER FUCKER" I had yet to turn my cards over so the "soul read" was enough to put me in shock for a bit and not realize what had happened until the uber ride back to the hotel. Other guy in the hand furiously slams down pocket 8's and starts berating the dealer staring him down as if the dealer just came to his house and crippled his dog with the nastiest suplex wrestling has ever seen. The entire casino is quite at this point everyone looking at our table you couldn't even hear chip shuffling which was so common 5 minutes earlier, just these two guys going at it. I was genuinely scared for the dealer I thought pocket 8's guy was going to jump over the table and punch him. He kept yelling "you've been dealing me shit like this all night!!" Floor was called over Muslim guy had to step outside for a while pocket 8's guy was asked to leave. I got up to leave about 15 minutes later taking the loss like a champion thinking to myself "this is what it takes to be a pro, take the loses in stride" (lol). All the positive things I kept telling myself instantly went away as I walk out and see old Muslim guy just smiling at me asking if I was leaving. Moral of the story fold pre when you're racking up.
submitted by thatsooks to poker [link] [comments]
Adventure: Ship (Ch. 17)
First l
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An ocean of red surrounded him, stretching as far as the eye could see. The landscape was featureless, just a constant crimson that engulfed even the horizon. Picking up a foot he took a step forward, then he felt it, the feeling of something breaking beneath his feet. It reverberated through his leg, the ripples from the disturbed crimson surface spread outwards from him as the feeling spread inwards. He gritted his teeth, the feeling wouldn't relent, the ocean was draining away, a sense of dread filled him, he didn't want to see, he didn't want to know what he stepped on, but it just kept draining. He would see it soon, he would know, he didn't want to, he didn't want to, he didn't want to, he didn't want to, he didn't...
David woke with a start, he was breathing heavily and shaking uncontrollably in a cold sweat. He took a few deep breaths and rubbed his face to wake himself.
Just a dream. He brought his breathing back down to normal and looked at the clock on the wall, It was early morning. David sighed and laid his head back down, he would doze a bit till it was a more appropriate time to wake. At least he tried to, he couldn't seem to get even a nap in. Cursing it all he just grabbed the controls for the entertainment system to find something to preoccupy himself.
He swapped through a series of shows over the next couple of hours. He watched recent news for a bit, then a couple of different nature documentaries on various planets, and then a brutal version of football where the players were all remotely piloting heavy robots they could slam around with impunity. Eventually the hospital came to life again and the Vildune doctor entered into his room.
It gave him a quizzical look before speaking. "Oh, you're awake, didn't expect you to be up this early."
David gave a smile in return. "Yeah I guess I'm just an early riser." He turned the entertainment system off so he could properly listen.
"Well since you are up, we could start your final examination so we can get you cleared to leave."
David perked up a bit. "Sounds like a plan to me." The doctor started testing his body, poking, prodding and recording his reflexes. He shined a light in his eyes and questioned it's reflective properties, to which David gave a summarized explanation. The doctor was intrigued but didn't push him for more details, instead continuing with the examination. He finished by having him stand and conducting a basic mobility test. David went through a range of motions and stretches to make sure everything was working as intended.
Content with the tests the doctor had David sit. "Looking good, everything seems to be in order. Do you feel that something's off or otherwise not operating as it should?"
David just shook his head. "No everything feels fine."
The doctor nodded. "Alright, once I submit this form you'll be cleared to leave, if you could just sign here, thank you, any questions?"
Something popped into his head that he had forgotten. "Actually yeah, where did my stuff go?"
"You mean your pants? We were keeping it stored for you after we had it cleaned."
"Was there a blue scale in one of the pockets, do you still have that?" David was getting concerned.
"Yes I believe there was, we stored it with the pants if that's what you are wondering about."
David let out a relieved sigh. "Thanks, I would like that returned to me please."
The doctor nodded. "Of course, a nurse will bring your effects as well as a new printed shirt and pair of shoes."
"Appreciate it doc, thanks again." The doctor gave him a smile then left to file the paperwork. David sat down on the bed again to wait for everything to be processed. It was maybe ten minutes before a nurse showed up to deliver his clothes. The pile was deposited on the bedside with a polite nod, then they left.
David noticed the scale on top and picked it up to examine it again, It still had its luster but the edges were scuffed and scratched now, a testament to its use in his escape. He smiled to himself,
I should make this into a necklace or something. He set it aside while he stripped down and got his clothes on. After he was properly dressed he slipped the scale into one pocket and the credit chip into his other before exiting his room.
Stepping into the hall he inhaled deeply, enjoying the freedom that he had missed. A call from down the hallway got his attention as he turned to see Sky and Solomon sitting in some chairs, evidently waiting for him. He smiled and approached to pair who stood to greet him. "Morning Sky, Solomon, were you guys waiting for me?"
"Not for very long." Solomon responded. "We decided it would be appropriate to congratulate you on your release from the hospital."
David chuckled a bit. "Thanks, but it was just one night, no need to stand on ceremony."
Solomon did a 'shrug'. "Well it was that, and Sky here doesn't seem to want to let you out of his sight." Sky snapped to Solomon with a look of betrayal before looking at the ground embarrassed.
David laughed and ruffled his head feathers a bit. Sky actually flinched a little at that, and a needle of sadness pierced David's heart. "Don't worry Sky I'm not going anywhere fast. I got to contact my boss and let them know the situation, then I have to get a new ship, supplies, equipment and a general sense of what I'm going to do next." Sky just nodded and continued staring at the floor. "Well, I'm going to go send a message, so you guys can wait for me at the front if you want."
With a nod they left to wait and David went off at a brisk pace to the public terminals. Following the signs on the walls he found them fairly quickly and signed in to his account. Labeling the message as an emergency situation update, he summarized the events of what transpired to the best of his abilities.
Before he hit send, he hesitated as he thought about something. His boss technically did belong to a branch of the government so maybe they could pull some strings for him. He added a p.s. to his letter asking for a favor and sent off the message. With that done he signed out of everything and left to meet up with Sky and Solomon.
He found them waiting in the lobby and with a wave joined up with them. "Sorry to keep you waiting. So, what's the plan for today then?"
Solomon responded. "I was going to research where I may be needed as a doctor or if there was a hospital that could use my services."
"Well wherever you go they will be lucky to have you. I think I'm going to get a new ship first, if you find out where you want to go, I can give you a lift so you don't have to hire a shuttle."
Solomon raised a manipulator at him. "I don't want to impose on you more than I have already."
David scoffed. "Impose? Come on, you're not imposing. We can just take a jump gate and be anywhere with another orbital station, and even if there wasn't a jump gate it would still be no big deal. Just accept the offer already, you might hurt my feelings if you don't." David got him with that one, his manipulators slumped a bit as he was caught between a rock and a hard place, and he knew it.
"Twist my tentacles why don't you. Fine, I will graciously accept your offer."
David smiled a devious little smile at his success. "Excellent, lets meet up later tonight to talk about things. If I remember correctly, I think there is a bar on level 23 called Zarg's bar 'n grill, sounds plain but they fix up a damn good drink. Lets meet around seven, standard Terran time, tonight for a bit of celebration and planning."
"Sounds good. I take it you are going to stay with David, Sky?" Sky was still embarrassed and just nodded. "Well then, I will see you both later." With that he turned and left leaving the two of them alone.
David turned to Sky who looked at him finally. "Well we should get going and find a new ship." Sky nodded and followed slightly behind him as they walked. They found an unoccupied lift and David set in a command to take them to the market level. Sky was being quiet the whole time and David felt kind of awkward with the little guy just standing there like some kind of attendant.
David decided he should try and start a conversation. "So how are you doing?"
Sky looked up at him quizzically. "What do you mean?"
"I mean with everything that's happened. You doing alright?"
Sky looked back down apparently thinking about it. "I'm not sure, I guess I'm a little nervous. I've never been anywhere but the Dread Throne before, I have no idea what to expect or do."
David bobbed his head a few times. "I see, well don't worry, I think you'll like freedom more than you know." A soft chime sounded in the lift and the door opened to reveal the market, bustling with life as people went to and from different shops and stalls talking to the various vendors selling goods from their planets. The diversity of life in the crowd was always exhilarating. Many different species walking, sliding, crawling, and flying all over the place while talking to the vendors, haggling and buying what they wanted, was energizing to say the least.
David was about to step out of the lift when he felt a hand grab onto his pocket. David looked down to see Sky, wide eyed, staring at the crowd of people like a deer in headlights before blinking a few times and noticing what he did. His hand quickly shot back down to his side and he mumbled a quick "I'm sorry."
David gave him a soft smile. "It's ok, just stay close and you'll be fine." Sky nodded and they exited together. David started weaving through the crowd Sky kept close to his side as he did. David found Sky's reaction to be quite funny as he stared at everything, mouth slightly agape like a little kid. Sky's gaze lingered on a vendor who was selling some hefty looking alien fruits, and David thought he might have saw Sky gulp a little bit at the sight of them.
Why not. David weaved his way over to the vendor with Sky in tow. Stopping in front of the stall the vendor gave him a warm welcome and insisted they buy his merchandise. David, not one to disappoint, scanned over the fruits for a moment before he saw one with good size and color to it. Selecting it from the pile, the merchant presented a device to pay with and David inserted his new chip into it, then scanned his hand. A second later a green light came on and the vendor gave him a polite bow in thanks for the patronage.
David turned back to Sky and presented the fruit to him. His eyes went wide as he stared at it, mouth hanging open, and David thought he might start drooling. He reached for it but stopped part way, hesitating. He looked up and David and asked "Can I?" Icy cold needles of sadness were everywhere in his heart now.
David managed to keep smiling and replied. "Yes, go ahead." Sky grabbed hold of the fruit with both hands and looked upon it like it was the most valuable thing in the world. He opened up and sunk his beak into the fruits flesh, slicing into it with an ease born of his natural affinity towards it's consumption. A look that could only be described as ecstasy flooded across his features as he practically melted on the spot, savoring every ounce of flavor.
David just smiled at his friends, but the sadness ate at his insides. This was probably the first real fruit Sky had eaten since he was a little kid. Anger at the snake bitch rose from the grave, but with nowhere to go, it evaporated into the ether. "Can you eat and walk Sky?" Sky snapped out of his own personal rapture and took a moment to process the question before giving him a quick nod. David smiled and started walking again, making sure he kept an eye on Sky as he ate his fruit so he didn't wander off.
He found a directory at a junction and looked over it for the shipyard. Target located he headed in that direction and into an interior lift which he keyed the correct sub level to go to. Sky had managed to finish an impressive amount of the fruit by the time they stepped out.
The entire level was dedicated to the creation and selling of ships of all shapes and sizes. The reception lobby was all clean polished metal with a large desk manned by three individuals of various species. David walked up to the desk with Sky behind him taking in the sights as he munched on his food.
A polite greeting was had and they asked how they could be of service. "Yes, I'm in the market for a high end exploration ship, powerful scanners, good for long journeys, and preferably a method of self defense." No way was he gonna be caught with his pants literally down again.
The individual talking to him gave him a once over before replying. "Such a ship would be quite expensive sir."
David felt a twinge of irritation, he knew he didn't look great in his plain white shirt and worn pants, but he adopted a smug grin. Pulling over the credit scanner he inserted his chip into it. "Is this enough?"
David watched with immense satisfaction as their eyes widened in surprise and they tripped over themselves trying to apologize. "M...my apologize sir, please follow me we will get you a custom ship to your exact desires." They proceeded to lead the pair down a hallway and into a private room.
The doors money opens, David mused. He sat in a really nice leather chair, Sky just finished the last of his fruit as he sat next to him. The receptionist excused themselves to retrieve a representative that could help them. They waited in the room for a few minutes before the door opened again revealing a four armed biped, Quallexen David believed the name was, fifth seat of the alliance. The light green skin on its body was indicative of the foliage of its planet, it had skin that looked like a lizards, its slender form was incredibly flexible putting even the best of earth contortionists to shame.
It entered and raised an eyebrow at the two of them for a quick moment before adopting its practiced business face. "Hello, my names Cathol, I heard you would like to order a custom ship?"
David nodded. "Indeed, I'd like to see all your options if you wouldn't mind." Cathol walked over and handed them a data-pad prompting a holo-display to appear in the middle of the room, and then sat across from them. David examined the information on the pad, a complete list of ship types, features, and cosmetic preferences. David looked across at the dealer who was apparently not expecting much from the pair. David fought to keep the smug look under control and began to make his selections.
Selecting the newest line of Venture series ships he sifted through the options and saw an impressive list of function and comfort items. He began selecting some of the options such as, nice pilot seats, lounge, gym, fabricator, and fully stocked kitchen. This got another raised eyebrow from Cathol but David wasn't done yet. Moving on to the functional features he specified complete control of the ship from the cockpit, Biometric scanners, Reinforced doors, localized environmental controls for each room, customized suites with one set to the preferences of Aoulooron's and the others defaulted to human preferences, shields as heavy as were allowed on a civilian vessel and equally heavy armament, then finished it off with a few cosmetic changes.
Cathol was now quite surprised by all the selections, but to their credit they did a fairly good job at hiding it. He cleared his throat before speaking. "Well sir, if you are done with your selections I can give you a quote." He used a data-pad of his own and input a few things, then a number appeared that was quite large. David had the money most definitely but his mother would strangle him if he didn't at least try and haggle it down.
"Seriously? I know its custom but I could probably get this same ship at a discount at Atlas station."
Cathol's brow furrowed a bit "Sir I assure you this is an accurate estimate of the price."
Tough cookie huh. "Alright Sky come on, we'll try at the next station." Sky looked slightly confused at what was going on but got up anyway and followed him towards the door.
"Sir, please wait, I can maybe adjust the price a bit for you." He tapped on his pad again and the number was shaved down a little bit.
David walked back into the room a little bit but didn't sit down. "You have my interest, but not my business yet."
"Sir you must be reasonable, this is a tall order to fill."
"I'm not asking for much Cathol, just a price that we can both be happy with at the end of the day." Cathol stared at him for a moment but David was putting on his best poker face. With a sigh Cathol tapped once again on the pad and the number dropped a little again. David gave a smile at the new price. "There we go, that is a more acceptable number." He sat back down in the chair. "Now how soon can I expect this to be done?"
"We have a ship in this model ready, we would just need to add all your preferred features. It should be done by tomorrow afternoon."
"Sounds good to me, where do I sign?" A image appeared on his pad, standard agreement for this kind of deal. He gave a quick once over of the forms and then signed his name at the bottom. Cathol now smiled and stood to offer him a hand, which David took.
"Pleasure doing business with you sir. Your order will arrive at hanger C on the 54
th floor after midday tomorrow."
"Thank you Cathol, I will expect it then." Cathol escorted the pair to the exit and saw them off with a polite bow as the lift door closed. David released the tension in his body with a sigh. Sky was looking at him with a questioning look.
"What just happened?" He finally asked.
David chuckled a bit. "It's called haggling Sky, some places let you negotiate on the price, and sometimes you have to be aggressive about it." Sky just thought on it for a second before shaking his head apparently giving up on the concept for the moment. David chuckled again but turned his mind towards stocking his new ship and getting equipment.
Time for some shopping. ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
As usual let me know what you think down below and of anything that could improve my writing.
submitted by XSevenSins to HFY [link] [comments]
A list of every Unus Annus video name
I made a list of every Unus Annus video name. Posting this here because someone wanted to see it and a comment doesn't allow more than 1000 characters.
November 15th - Unus Annus
(note- The Very Start.)
November 15th - Cooking with Sex Toys
(note- 365 Days Left)
November 16th - Purging Our Sins with a Net Pot
November 17th - Hot Dog'd to Death
November 18th - Making Our Own Sensory Deprivation Tank
November 19th - The Good Kind of Cupping
November 20th - The Bad Kind of Cupping
November 21st - The Worst Kind of Cupping
November 22nd - Ethan Will Be Kicked in the Balls
November 23rd - Doing Each Other's Makeup in the Dark
November 24th - Baby Hands Operation
November 25th - Mark and Ethan Summon a Ghost
November 26th - 2 Truths and 1 Lie -- Waxing Edition
November 27th - Poopsie Sparkly Critters (a slime surpise...)
November 28th - Play-Doh Thanksgiving
November 29th - Helium Therapy
November 30th - Drawing Memes From Memory
December 1st - 1 Man 100 Accents
December 2nd - An A.I. Predicts How We're Going to Die
December 3rd - Mark Turns Ethan into a Mummy to Prepare Him for the Great Beyond
December 4th - The Cubby Gummy Challenge
December 5th - We Buy a Professional Hypnosis Video and React To It
December 6th - Mark and Ethan Attempt and Escape Room
December 7th - Ethan Destroys Mark's Van with a Bat
December 8th - There's Still Hope...
December 9th - Ethan Gives Mark a Viking Funeral
December 10th - The Great Meat Mistake
December 11th - Acupuncture Is NOT Painful
December 12th - Floating in a Real Sensory Deprivation Tank
December 13th - Mark Reviews The Impossible Burger But There's a Looming Sense of Impending Doom
(note- Paintball gun)
December 14th - We Made Nude Pictures of Eachother
December 15th - You made Beautiful Music for The Barrel... But Only One Could Win
December 16th - We Had To Drink Each Other's Pee
(note- The first of the Pee Trilogy)
December 17th - Ethan Explores Mark's Haunted Basement
December 18th - Giving Away Our 1,000,000 Subscriber Gold Play Button
December 19th - Ethan's Relaxing and Totally Normal Naul Salon
December 20th - Taped and Afraid
December 21st - What Was The Most Painful Thing We've Ever Endured?
December 22nd - Donating Toys to charity w/ JackSepticEye
December 23rd - Harnessing Our Dogs' Unlimited Energy
December 24th - Santa's Mukbang (Drinking 1 Gallon of Eggnog)
December 25th - Forcibly Turning Mark Into Santa Claus Against His Will
December 26th - Preserving Ourselves In Wax
(note- JackSepticEye was also here!)
December 27th - Beating Inanimate Objects to Death
December 28th - Emotional Pain vs Physical Pain... Which is worse?
December 29th - Duct Tape Crusifixion (Amy, Please Don't Watch This Video)
December 30th - You Blink You Lose
December 31th - 2 Grown Men Attempt the Presidential Fitness Test
January 1st - We Took The Polar Plunge
Janurary 2nd - Hiding Out Sins from Amy's Holy Peepers
January 3rd - We Eat Bugs
January 4th - DIY Bungee Jump (Please don't try this)
(note- Disclamer Song Origin)
January 5th - We Have The BEST Thumbnails on Youtube and No One Can Tell Us Otherwise
January 6th - Who Can Make Themselves Taller?
January 7th - The Sensory Overload Tank
January 8th - Recreating Ourselves as a Cursed Mannequin
January 9th - We Took an IQ Test
January 10th - Ethan Fianlly Becomes a MAN
January 11th - Mark and Ethan Go Casket Shopping
January 12th - We Take a Lie Detector Test to Uncover Our Darkest Sins
January 13th - Learning to Breathe Underwater
January 14th - Fixing Mark's Hole with Ramen but Every Time We Add Glue We Get 5% Closer to God
(note- The hole made in the video where Mark punched a hole in the wall)
January 15th - Mark Steals Ethan's Face
January 16th - You Breathe You Die
January 17th - 2 Absolute Beginners Experience the Dancing Glory that is Salsa
January 18th - DIY Geriatric Simulator
January 19th - This Is How We'll Die...
January 20th - We Cryogenically Freeze Ourselves
January 21st - This is What Being Tased Feels Like
January 22nd - What Happens When A Youtube Channel Dies?
January 23rd - Bad Bad Beans
January 24th - We hired a Real Hypnotherapist to Analyze Our Darkest Dreams
January 25th - We Turned Our Bodies Into Art
(note- painting each other naked)
January 26th - Mark and Ethan Lean About The Human Body
January 27th - Mark Punishes Ethan
January 28th - Strange (and legal) Things You Can Do With Your Body After Death
January 29th - DIY Cheese
January 30th - Hacking The Very Fabric of the Universe
January 31st - Looking at Long Lost Memes
February 1st - Discovering the Secret to Eternal Life
February 2nd - Turning Mark Into an E-Boy
February 3rd - Ethan Redefines Male Beauty
February 4th - Professional Fire Cupping (Going Even Further Beyond)
February 5th - An Extremely Sour, Not-at-all Sour Meal
February 6th - Literally Eating Fire
February 7th - Unregulated Axe Throwing
February 8th - Literally Laying On Broken Glass
February 9th - Making an Indoor Tornado to Flex on Mother Nature
February 10th - Nutball: The Most Dangerous Game
(note- First of the Nutball Trilogy)
February 11th - Becoming a Master of Mime
February 12th - Discussing the Idea of Murdering Each Other bit It's Just a Joke and Definitely Not Serious Haha
February 13th - Are We Already Dead?
February 14th - Our Perfect (and last) Valentine's Day
February 15th - Drunk College Party Simulator
February 16th - 10 Strange Amazon Paroducts Ethan Bought Mark Because He Doesn't Know How To Spend Money Responsibly
February 17th - Chickens Teach Us About Life and Death
February 18th - 3 Big Boys Attempt the Kings Royal Fitness Test
February 19th - Being Attacked by a Fully Trained Bodyguard Dog
February 20th - Learning the Ancient Art of Chinese Archery
February 21st - The Ultimate Trolley Problem
February 22nd - Goat Yoga
February 23rd - Edible Slime was a Mistake
February 24th - Granting Acces Into Heaven's Sweet Gates
February 25th - Long Hair, Do We Dare?
(note- With Marks Quarintine Hair, yes, he did dare)
February 26th - We Wrote a Hit Pop Song in 30 Minutes
February 27th - Mark and Ethan go on a "Drum Date"
February 28th - Blowing Our Souls Into Some Hot Glass
February 29th - Top 10 Worst Things Your Friend Could Possibly Spend Their Money On
March 1st - Nutball Extreme: Taser Edition
(note- Second of the Nutball Trilogy)
March 2nd - REAL Ghost Hunting at an Abandoned Zoo
March 3rd - We Bought a Camera That Can Look Inside Us
March 4th - Becoming the World's Greatest DJs
March 5th - Who Can Teach Their Dog a Trick the Fastest?
March 6th - Middle School Science Experiment Teaches Us About Life and Death
(note- Owl pellets)
March 7th - DIY Chiropractor
March 8th - Mark and Ethan Get Into a Fight
March 9th - The Barrel - Offical Music Video
March 10th - We Got Pepper Sprayed
March 11th - We Give Each Other Tattoos Blindfolded
March 12th - What Does Astrology Say About Our Friendship?
March 13th - Mark and Ethan Get a Full Body Scan to See What Secrets Lay Hidden Within (and learn their body fat)
March 14th - Mark Needs To Rub Ethan and Only His Mom Can Help Him
March 15th - 2 Idiots Get Crushed by 18-Foot Giant Snakes
March 16th - Beer Sauna: Turning a Portable Sauna into a Portable Hell
(note- The video where Pee Sauna was first mentioned)
March 17th - Mark and Ethan Hunt The World's Most Wanted Criminals
March 18th - Unus Annus Carves the Roast Beast
March 19th - 5 Weird Apps That Predicted Our Death
March 20th - We Tried a Labor Pain Simulator
March 21st - Recreating the Miracle of Childbirth
March 22nd - Mark and Ethan Are Now Fathers
March 23rd - We Force James Charles to Run a Military Obstacle Course
March 24th - Desperately Trying To Not Touch Our Faces
(note- Start of Quarintine videos)
March 25th - Reddit 50/50: Two Player Edition
March 26th - Going on an Internet Scavenger Hunt
March 27th - Having an Adventure In VR Chat Becuase We Can't Go Outside
March 28th - Amazon Shopping for the Apocalypse
March 29th - Whom Would Eat Whomst First in a Zombie Apocalypse?
March 30th - Ultimate Youtuber Boxing Showdown
March 31st - The Deep End of Omegle: Risky Boogalo
(note- This video was deleted for an unknown reason)
April 1st - Where in the World is Unus Annus?
(note- Timer was at 401 days)
April 2nd - Mark Builds a Pillow Fort for the Very First Time
April 3rd - Mark's 1 Weird Talent Leaves Ethan Absolutely Speechless
April 4th - Wikifeet: A Tale of 2 Tootsies
April 5th - We Made Every YouTuber Battle in the Hunger Games
April 6th - We Google Each Other to Find Our Darkest Forgotten Sins
April 7th - We Played Mad Libs and Ran It Through Google Translate
April 8th - Mark and Ethan Desperately Try and Nae a Single State in the USA
April 9th - Speed Reading 1000+ WPM To Gain a Complete Understanding of All Human Knowledge
April 10th - What is the Least Viewed Video on YouTube
April 11th - We Found Websites That The World Forgot About
April 12th - The Scariest True Stories on the Internet
April 13th - How to NOT be the Perfect Boyfriend
April 14th - Mark and Ethan Find The Lost City of EL Dorado
April 15th - Mark and Ethan Bet Everything on a Wikipedia Race
April 16th - The Creepiest Videos on Youtube
April 17th - Help Us Break a YouTube World Record
(note- The birth of Norbert Moses. The video was called "Subscribe to Norbert Moses")
April 18th - 2 Men 200 Accents
April 19th - The Illuminati... Do They Really Exist?
April 20th - Using Google Maps to Find the Lost City of Atlantis
April 21st - Reading YOUR Scariest True Stories
April 22nd - Mark and Ethan Take a Personality Test
April 23rd - Will AI Soon Take Over Humanity As We Know It?
April 24th - Running Internet Drama through Google Translate
April 25th - The Secret Unus Annus NO-Touchy-Touchy Hand Shake
April 26th - Two Male Men Judge Female Women on Their Beauty
April 27th - Bored? Press This Button.
April 28th - Don't Go in the Ocean... Ever.
April 29th - We Explore the Most MYSTERIOUS Mysteries of our Wildy Mysterious Mystery Moon of Mysteries
April 30th - We Looked at Unus Annus Memes
May 1st - Is Mark a Masochist?
(note- yes.)
May 2nd - What the Hell is a Pink Trombone?
May 3rd - Professional Fetish Scientists Rank the Best/Worst Fetishes of 2020
May 4th - Mark and Ethan Desperately Attempt to Feel Something
May 5th - An A.I. Generates Out Worst Nightmare
May 6th - Are Reptilian Humanoids Living Among us?
May 7th - Like It or Not... This is What The New Human Looks Like
May 8th - Eating Only Onions for 24 Hours: How Many Onions Does it Take to Kill a Man?
May 9th - Unus Annus ASMR
May 10th - We Attempted to Create THICC Water
May 11th - Making Our Own Gravestones to Prepare For Our Inevitable Demise
May 12th - How Tall Can A Human Get?: An Impartial Review by 2 Average Height Men
May 13th - Mark Teaches Ethan Korean
May 14th - Bigfoot is Real and It Ate My Friend
May 15th - The End of Unus Annus is Almost Here...
(note- The Halfway point)
May 16th - We Explore the Unus Annus Subreddit for Your Delicious Memes
May 17th - How Big Can a Nuke Get?
May 18th - How Much Caffeine Does It Take to Kill a Man?
May 19th - Drinking Real THICC Water... How Bad Does It Taste?
May 20th - We Played Strip Poker
(note- Mark lost so badly. Ethan also cheated on the first game)
May 21st - Harnessing Our Yodeling Power to End the World aAs We Know It
May 22nd - Mark Cooks Blindfolded While Ethan Guides Him Through FaceTime
May 23rd - We Played the Newlywed Game While Consuimg That Which Will Kill the Other
May 24th - DIY Boob
May 25th - We Have the Best Bellies on Youtube
May 26th - The Unus Annus Confessional Booth
May 27th - DO NOT OPEN UNTIL 2080
(note- Mark will be 90 and Ethan will be 83)
May 28th - Only UNUS-es May Watch This Video
(note- Unus vs Annus. Most Likes to Win.)
May 28th - Only ANNUS-es May Watch This Video
(note- Annus vs Unus. Most Likes to Win.)
May 29th - Only Watch from 2:15 to 6:11 --- DO NOT WATCH ANY OTHER PART OF THE VIDEO
(note- Annus Won)
May 30th - DIY Wine
May 31st - Tearing a Phone Book in Half with Our Huge Manly Muscles
June 1st - 2 Complete Amateurs Enter a Body Building Competition
June 2nd - BLACK LIVES MATTER. Resources and How You Can Help in the Description.
(note- This video was 8 Minutes and 47 seconds of silence)
June 3rd - Crushing Watermelons Betwixt Our Mighty Thighs
June 4th - Morphing Our Bodies Into Superhero Poses
June 5th - Reacting to Your Hilarious Green Screen Memes
June 6th - Mark Teaches Ethan to Read with Hooked on Phonics
June 7th - Ethan Roasts Mark of 15 Minutes Straight
June 8th - There's Something Horribly Wrong with This Picture...
(note- When they made their own creepy photos)
June 9th - Attempting to Build IKEA Furniture Without Instructions
June 10th - Mark and Ethan Become United State Citizens
June 11th - We Made Fanart for Each Other
June 12th - Our Fans Try and Scare Us with Their Homemade Creepypasta
June 13th - Recreating Childhood Photos
June 14th - Will We Break the Boards... Or Will They Break Us?
June 15th - Finding the Most Cursed Image on the Internet
June 16th - Learning to Cry on Command to Increase Our YouTube Views
June 17th - Pee Sauna
(note- The end of quarintine videos. Second of the Pee Trilogy)
June 18th - Building IKEA's Hardest Piece of Furniture Without Instruction is Impossible
June 19th - Becoming One With the Horse
June 20th - The Ultimate Paper Airplane Showdown
June 21st - Creating Mark FISHbach
(note- Origin of Mermer
June 22nd - Leaning How to Lock Pick (FBI Please Don't Watch)
June 23rd - The Most Dangerous Shave
June 24th - Ethan Traps Mark's Soul in the Palm of his Hand
June 25th - Bear Trapping 101: An Elegant Knot For An Elegant Beast
June 26th - 2 Men In a Trench Coat Teach You How to Save Money at the Movies
June 27th - Building the World's First IKEA Boat
June 28th - Ethan Teaches Mark How to Swim
June 29th - 10 Miracle Products to Give YOU the Thiccest Jaw on Planet Earth
June 30th - 2 Dirty Boys Wash Their Filthy Mouths Out with Soap
July 1st - Mark is Guilty. Ethan Has the Proof.
July 2nd - Recreating Mark's Childhood
July 3rd - We Put an Apple Watch in a Rock Tumbler
July 4th - Dummy Thicc for Dummies | A Tale of 2 Butts | Pushing Our Butts Even Further Beyond
July 5th - Reverse Engineering a Kite to Steal the Idea of Electricity From Benjamin Franklin
July 6th - The Candy Bra Challenge
July 7th - Mark and Ethan Look at a Puppy for 10 Minutes
July 8th - Unus Annus Try Pole Dancing
July 9th - This Is Hiding On Your Body RIGHT NOW.
July 10th - Tasting Weird Food Combos: Pickles and Chocolate? Ice Cream and Soy Sauce?
July 11th - The Unus Annus Space Program
July 12th - The Egg Smashing Game
July 13th - Can You Bake a Cookie from Cookie Dough Ice Cream?
July 14th - Bleachus Annus
July 15th - Dunking Oreos In Literally Anything But Milk
July 16th - Preparing a 5-Star Meal for Our Youtube Famous Dogs
July 17th - DIY Teeth
July 18th - How to Escape from a Hostage Situation
July 19th - Does This Magnetic Skincare Routine Really Work?
July 20th - DIY Bed of Nails : OH GOD, PLEASE DON'T EVER TRY THIS
July 21st - The Human Mop
July 22nd - Can Sound Therapy Heal All Wounds?
July 23rd - This Is The Most Dangerous Children's Toy Ever Made
July 24th - Would Chica Save Us From Drowning?
July 25th - We Do It Better Than Icarus Ever Could
July 26th - The Beginning of The End
(note- 110 days left. Start of the Desert videos)
July 27th - The Annual Unus Annus Dunk Contest
July 28th - Ultimate Horseshoes
July 29th - A Serious Conversation Under the Stars
(note- Last of the Desert videos)
July 30th - Recharging Our Phones Using Only Brute Strength
July 31st - 5 Products to Grow Your Patchy Beard
August 1st - Mark Teaches Ethan How to Play the Trumpet
August 2nd - Playing Cards: The World's Deadliest Weapon
August 3rd - We Lubed Our Floor For a Sliding Competition
August 4th - Breaking Glass With Our Screams
August 5th - This is Goodbye
(note- 100 Days Left)
August 6th - Mark and Ethan Share a Drink
August 7th - The Wubble
August 8th - Mark and Ethan Shave Chica
August 9th - DO NOT TRY THIS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
August 10th - Judging Your Terrible Unus Annus Ideas
August 11th - Hydro Dipping a Baby
August 12th - Popping Popcorn with a High-Powered Laser
August 13th - Puberty Simulator
August 14th - Grip Strength Test: Loser Becomes the Winner's Butler for a Day
(note- Ethan "won" but Mark never became his Butler)
August 15th - Transforming Mark into the 8th Wonder of the World
August 16th - Momiplier Teaches Self-Defense
August 17th - Playing Children's Games in Total Darkness
August 18th - We're Better Than Dogs
August 19th - The Koala Challenge: TikTok's Intimate Couple's Trend
August 20th - 1 Gallon of Jello Nearly Broke Us
August 21st - Too Many Pickles
(note- The Video before the start of Camp Unus Annus)
August 22nd - Pitching a Tent in the Woods But There's a Bear 15 Feet Away
(note- Start of Camp Unus Annus. Mark was Blind while Ethan was Deaf)
August 23rd - How to Rescue a Cat from a Tree
August 24th - A Bear Attacked Us in the Middle of the Night
August 25th - How to Safely Bury Your Friend
August 26th - Team Building for 2: Trust Fall, Tug-of-War, and More!
August 27th - How to Start a Fire (except don't...)
(note- The infamous video where Unus appears at the window before Mark kills Ethan)
August 28th - Mark's Outdoor Escape Room
August 29th - Hunting HeeHoo
August 30th - Was 2020 a Bad Year for Unus Annus?
(note- End of Camp Unus Annus)
August 31st - Mark Gives Ethan a HOT (stone) Massage
September 1st - We Smell Every Smell
September 2nd - How Many Slaps Does It Take to Cook a Chicken?
September 3rd - 2 Boys 2 Poops
September 4th - Mark Teaches Ethan How to March in a Marching Band
September 5th - We Finally Drank Our DIY Wine
September 6th - 2 Adults Take a 4th Grade Math Test
September 7th - Making Snow Cones With Literally Anything but Normal Flavors
September 8th - We Attempts Pottery Without Amy's Help
September 9th - Can Plants Feel Pain?
September 10th - How Far Can We Chuck a 16lbs Rock?
September 11th - We Pierced Each Other's Ears
September 12th - We Ate Dog Treats So You Don't Have To
September 13th - We Accidentally Made an SCP While Amy Was Away
September 14th - BEYBLADE NUTBALL
(note- The Finale of the Nutball Trilogy)
September 15th - Making the Ultimate Unus Annus Burger
September 16th - Making Soda With Literally Anything But Soda
September 17th - Pee Soda
(note- The Finale of the Pee Trilogy)
September 18th - Learning to Use The Force
September 19th - Brick Soccer
September 20th - We Attempt to Make Holy Water
September 21st - Amy Sent Us a Mystery Box
September 22nd - Mark Knows What Ethan Did...
(note- Ethan cheated on the Grip Test Video)
September 23rd - This Video Will Never Make Sense
September 24th - We Attempt to Make UNHOLY Water
September 25h - We Will Churn Thy Butter
September 26th - Ethan Teaches Mark Gymnastics
September 27th - The Great Ice Cream Cake Race
September 28th - Mark Teaches Ethan to Wrestle
September 29th - Ethan Watches as Mark Achieves the Impossible
September 30th - Consuming the World's Hottest Chip
October 1st - This Video Went Completely Out of Control
October 2nd - The 1000 High Five Challenge
October 3rd - Bobbing For Apples But the Water Keeps Getting Thiccer
October 4th - Mark Breaks His Nose On An Aerial Hoop
(note- Was the second time in one week)
October 5th - Mark and Ethan Milk a Goat
October 6th - Shooting Archery ON A HORSE
October 7th - DIY Minesweeper
October 8th - Literally Finding a needle in a Haystack
October 9th - Drawing on Each Other's Backs in Total Darkness
October 10th - This is For FUN and NOT a Fetish
(note- They were in black bags with a vacuum to such out the air)
October 11th - Mark Conquers His Fear of Night Swimming
(note- Birth of the Gongoozler)
October 12th - The Painful Wolrd of Aerial Silks
October 13th - We Bought Every Grinch Costume on Ebay
October 14th - Pumpkin Taste Tier List
October 15th - Learn to Jump Higher in 16 Minutes and 16 Seconds
October 16th - Bobbing for Literally Anything but Apples
October 17th - This Video is Completely Unedited
(note- This is the video where they shoved Wax up their nose and Marks got stuck)
October 18th - Momiplier Tells Us True Scary Stories from Korea
October 19th - Pumpkin Spice "Challenge"
(note- Similar to the Cinnamon Challenge excpet with Pumpkin Spice and don't do this please)
October 20th - Mark and Ethan Build a Scarecrow
October 21st - Preassure Waching Our Sins Away
October 22nd - We Force Mark to Swin in the Ocean (HIS GREATEST FEAR)
(note- First of the Two Boat videos)
October 23rd - Fighting Fish to the Deathin in the Deep Blue Sea
(note- Second of the Two Boat Videos
October 24th - Cryptid Olympics
October 25th - Phasmophobia in Real Life
(note- Ghost hunt time)
October 26th - Edward Pumpkin Hands
(note- First Video in big spooky house)
October 27th - Blood Bath
October 28th - The Unus Annus Annual Costume Contest
(note- Second Video in big spooky house)
October 29th - Ethan Turns Mark into a Werewolf
October 30th - Ethan Kidnapped Mark
(note- Third Video in big spooky house. Ethan made Mark an escape room)
October 31st - The Truth of Unus Annus
(note- Final Video in the big house. They open the Custom Coffin and change from their clothes into their suits. 13 Days Left)
November 1st - Accepting the Truth
(note- They Accept they are going to die. They remain in their suits from this point onward)
November 2nd - The Unus Annus Last Supper
November 3rd - Being Brutally Honest with Each Other
(note- Mark cries)
November 4th - Recreating Every Single Unus Annus Video
(note- 45 minutes and 11 seconds. Longest video)
November 5th - All Our Video Ideas That Never Happened
November 6th - Who's Cutting Onions In Here???
November 7th - The 1st Annual Unus Annus Roast
November 8th - God's Fitness Test
November 9th - Saying Goodbye to All Our Guests
November 10th - Everything's Legal If You're Dead
(note- Cooking with Sex Toys 2)
November 11th - 7 Minutes in Heaven | 7 Minutes in Hell
(note- Ethan got heaven, Mark got hell)
November 12th - The Unus Annus Annual Sleepover
(note- The final video.)
November 13th - Goodbye.
(note- The final livestream.)
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Examining the Giants’ 2018 ‘miscalculations’ and their ongoing impact - The Athletic
Giants co-owner John Mara recently conceded what has been painfully obvious for three years.
“We definitely made some miscalculations in a number of areas in 2018,” Mara said after the Giants wrapped up the 2020 season.
Mara pinned Dave Gettleman’s 15-33 record in three seasons as general manager on those 2018 miscalculations. As a result, Mara is sticking with Gettleman for a fourth season due to greatly improved personnel moves last offseason.
Despite Mara’s clean slate, the Giants are still feeling the effects of the 2018 offseason. Every decision in roster building has a lasting impact and it has taken years to dig out from some of the misses Gettleman made in his first year on the job.
The Giants made a number of franchise-altering moves in 2018 and Mara didn’t specify which ones he viewed as miscalculations. So here’s an examination of the big moves from the 2018 offseason, why they didn’t work and how their impact has been felt in subsequent years.
• Sticking with Eli Manning
Quarterback Eli Manning was 37 years old and clearly in decline when Gettleman was hired. Manning had two years remaining on his contract, but the Giants could have cut him to create $9.8 million in cap savings while eating $12.4 million in dead money in 2018.
That was always a long shot and Gettleman made it clear that Manning was part of the plans in his introductory news conference, referencing a big game the quarterback had against the Eagles late in the 2017 season as evidence that the two-time Super Bowl MVP could still get the job done.
Would ownership have hired a general manager who advocated dumping Manning? Probably not. But Mara was adamant that there was no ownership mandate for Gettleman to make decisions geared toward one last run with Manning.
“That’s absolute nonsense,” Mara said last week.
In hindsight, cutting ties with Manning before the 2018 season would have been best for the future but it obviously would have been difficult to dump a franchise icon. But without even adding a successor in 2018, the Giants stuck with Manning again in 2019.
Cutting Manning in the 2019 offseason would have created $17 million in cap savings with just $6.2 million in dead money. The Giants, of course, took Daniel Jones with the sixth pick in the 2019 draft and he took over as the starter in Week 3 of his rookie season. Carrying Manning’s $23.2 million cap hit as a backup quarterback in 2019 was a poor use of resources.
• Signing Nate Solder
Even if there was pressure to build around Manning, Gettleman bears responsibility for the moves made with that objective in mind. Mara isn’t hands-on to the point where he dictates which specific players must be signed.
Signing left tackle Nate Solder to a four-year, $62 million contract with $34.8 million guaranteed was a gross miscalculation.
The Giants had a dire need at left tackle and Solder was the best option on the market. Anyone with a wi-fi connection knew that. But general managers don’t make seven-figure salaries for giving the biggest contracts to the biggest available names.
General managers earn their keep by evaluating all of the options and making decisions that give their team an advantage. Just look at what Solder’s former team did.
The Patriots determined Solder wasn’t worth the contract offered by the Giants despite seven solid seasons in New England. So the Patriots let Solder walk in free agency and traded a third-round pick to the 49ers for Trent Brown and a fifth-round pick. Brown counted just $1.9 million against the cap in 2018 and the Patriots didn’t miss a beat when he was plugged in at left tackle. In the process, the Patriots got a third-round compensatory pick in 2019 for Solder.
The takeaway: There’s always another option, so saying, “What else was Gettleman supposed to do?” isn’t an excuse for the Solder signing. And Gettleman had to have a Plan B at left tackle since the Giants’ top offensive line target in 2018 was guard Andrew Norwell, who signed a five-year, $66.5 million contract with the Jaguars. Once the Giants missed out on Norwell, they went all-in on Solder, which obviously hasn’t worked out.
Solder’s contract leaves the Giants in a tough spot after two disappointing seasons and an opt out for 2020. The Giants compounded the financial consequences by restructuring Solder’s contract before the 2019 season to create cap space. That move created $5 million in cap space in 2019 but added $2.5 million to the cap in the final two years of his deal.
Solder counted $5.6 million against the cap in 2020 during his opt out. He has cap hits of $16.5 million in 2021 and $18 million in 2022. The Giants can cut Solder this offseason to create $6 million in cap savings while eating $10.5 million in dead money.
The bottom line is the Solder contract was a major miscalculation and it continues to be a drain on the Giants’ finances.
• Other free agent signings
Whereas Solder was grossly overpaid, Gettleman’s other notable free agent signings in 2018 were simply poor evaluations.
Signing guard Patrick Omameh to a three-year, $15 million contract seemed reasonable. But the veteran was such a disaster that he was benched after six games and cut in Week 10 of his first season.
Linebacker Kareem Martin, who had familiarity with defensive coordinator James Bettcher from their time together in Arizona, was signed to a three-year, $15 million contract. Martin failed to make an impact in two seasons and was cut last offseason.
Giving running back Jonathan Stewart a two-year, $6.8 million contract wasn’t a big deal in terms of the cap implications. But Gettleman’s obstinate defense that the 31-year-old back hadn’t lost a step chipped away at his credibility when Stewart clearly had nothing left and was cut after one season.
In an ideal world, Omameh and Martin would have been established veteran starters on the 2020 roster. Instead, both were long gone. Misses happen in free agency. But it hurts that Gettleman signed them rather than keeping better players like Devon Kennard and Romeo Okwara, who have been far more productive with other teams since 2018.
• Trading for Ogletree
Like with the Solder signing, the Giants had a need at middle linebacker. So Gettleman took a big swing, sending 2018 fourth and sixth-round picks to the Rams for Alec Ogletree and a 2019 seventh-round pick.
It should have been a red flag that the Rams were looking to deal the 26-year-old Ogletree within a year of giving him a four-year, $42.75 million extension. Ogletree’s five interceptions in 2018 masked otherwise poor play. He struggled again in 2019 and was a cap casualty last offseason.
In all, Ogletree cost the Giants $20 million against the cap for two subpar seasons and a mid-round draft pick. Rebuilding teams shouldn’t give away draft picks and they should be cautious about adding high-priced veterans. The Giants violated both of those tenets with the Ogletree trade.
The Giants got it right at middle linebacker last offseason by signing Blake Martinez to a three-year, $30.75 million contract. If Gettleman had found a similar player in 2018, the Giants would have had better linebacker play in 2018 and 2019 plus an additional mid-round draft pick to develop.
• Trading JPP
The lone move Gettleman made during the 2018 offseason with the future in mind was trading defensive end Jason Pierre-Paul to the Buccaneers for a third-round pick. The trade came a year after former GM Jerry Reese gave Pierre-Paul a four-year, $62 million contract.
The trade left $15 million in dead money on the 2018 cap, but cleared a combined $37 million in cap charges off the books in 2019 and 2020. The Giants used the third-round pick on B.J. Hill, who had 5.5 sacks as a rookie and remains a solid rotational defensive tackle.
This trade looks worse in hindsight since Pierre-Paul has 30.5 sacks in the three seasons since the trade, which is tied for eighth-most in the NFL during that stretch. But dumping an aging player with a big contract for a draft pick wouldn’t have been a bad move if the Giants were rebuilding. The bigger problem is Gettleman’s inability to find a comparable replacement over the past three years.
• Picking Saquon
Using the No. 2 pick in the 2018 draft on running back Saquon Barkley is the decision that had the greatest impact on the franchise. The second pick is an incredibly valuable commodity that can make a seismic impact on a franchise, like when the Giants took Lawrence Taylor at No. 2 in 1981.
As Gettleman said, everyone saw him “drool all over myself” when evaluating Barkley in the pre-draft process. Barkley is supremely talented, but one of the main arguments against using a premium resource on a running back has been realized, since injuries have limited Barkley to just 31 of 48 career games.
The obvious alternative was taking a quarterback. It’s impossible to know how that would have turned out. No. 3 pick Sam Darnold has been a disappointment for the Jets, who may move on this offseason. No. 7 pick Josh Allen was a second-team All-Pro this season after a breakout Year 3 for the Bills. No. 10 pick Josh Rosen has been a complete flop and is already on his fourth team. So clearly there were a wide range of outcomes if the Giants took a quarterback instead of Barkley.
If the Giants took Allen and built a strong supporting cast around him like Buffalo has, maybe they’d be playing in the divisional round this weekend. And if they took Rosen, they’d probably already be back in the market for another quarterback.
The other option was trading back. We’ll never know if Gettleman could have received the package the Jets sent the Colts for the No. 3 pick (the No. 6 pick, two second-round picks in 2018, one second-round pick in 2019). Maybe if Gettleman had a better poker face about his commitment to Manning and infatuation with Barkley, the Jets would have been compelled to trade up to No. 2 to avoid having the Giants beat them to Darnold. But Gettleman admitted to never seriously considering offers for the pick because he was so dead set on taking Barkley.
The Colts took a three-time first-team All-Pro guard (No. 6 pick Quenton Nelson) and an excellent right tackle (No. 37 pick Braden Smith) with the first two picks from the Jets. They then traded the other second-round pick (No. 49) to the Eagles for the 52nd pick (edge rusher Kemoko Turay) and the 169th pick (running back Jordan Wilkins). They then used the 2019 second-round pick from the Jets (No. 34 overall) on cornerback Rock Ya-Sin. Turning the No. 3 pick into two stud offensive linemen, a starting cornerback, a rotational pass rusher and a backup running back is a master class in maximizing value.
Gettleman and Mara don’t view the Barkley pick as a mistake.
“I’m still happy that we have him,” Mara said last week. “I certainly expect him to be a Giant for a very long time.”
Again, we’ll never know if Gettleman could have secured the same offer or something similar to what the Colts landed for the third pick. But it’s tough to stomach how the team directly behind the Giants in the 2018 draft got so much more out of their premium pick.
• Extending Odell
Giving wide receiver Odell Beckham Jr. a five-year, $90 million extension during training camp was the last big move of the 2018 offseason. There were rumors that the Giants could trade Beckham during the 2018 offseason, but they didn’t have much of a choice regarding an extension once they kept him.
Beckham had been a good soldier throughout the 2018 offseason so they rewarded him with the monster contract. Playing hardball with the team’s best player would have made for a rough start to first-year head coach Pat Shurmur’s tenure.
The Giants clearly had regrets, as they dealt Beckham to the Browns for safety Jabrill Peppers, a first-round pick and third-round pick after the season. Ultimately, the failed marriage resulted in the Giants paying Beckham $20 million for 12 games in the 2018 season. Even if the trade is viewed as a positive for the Giants now, the financial impact of the extension was significant.
Gettleman has acknowledged multiple times that his plan to win while rebuilding was flawed.
“As I’ve already admitted, ‘18 was not a stellar year, personnel-wise,” Gettleman said last week. “We’ve learned from our mistakes.”
If only it were that easy. There are consequences for such mistakes. The Giants just went 6-10 this season and have numerous holes to fill, yet they’re only projected to have the 19th-most cap space this offseason despite the benefit of having a quarterback on his rookie contract. Decisions like keeping Manning through the end of his contract and giving Solder a megadeal have financial implications that can’t be swept under the rug.
Mara and Gettleman both view the 2019 offseason as a step in the right direction. That’s debatable. The Giants certainly feel good about the Beckham trade despite the offense’s glaring lack of a No. 1 receiver. The lone big-ticket free-agent addition of the 2019 offseason — four years, $37.5 million for 30-year-old wide receiver Golden Tate — went about as poorly as the Solder signing. The evaluation of the 2019 offseason hinges on quarterback Daniel Jones, and the jury is still out on the sixth pick in last year’s draft.
“Our processes are better,” Gettleman said. “I think this past year showed the fruits of that, both in free agency and in the draft. I really believe strongly we’ll continue in that way.”
No one can dispute that Gettleman nailed free agency last offseason, while it’s too early to judge the draft. The Giants need a similar offseason this year as they continue to dig out of the hole created by the miscalculations of 2018.
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